Truthfully
by Wandering Letters
Summary: Truthfully, anything can happen. Anything you hold dear can be taken in an instant. Actions speak louder than words, but the feeling behind those actions is what makes us who we are. Contains OOC. Rated M for sexual content and slight strong language.
1. The Day She Promised

Hope and Lightning- Truthfully

Chapter 1- The Day She Promised

I found it hard to believe this was actually happening. I couldn't believe she agreed to this; it happened so suddenly.

_"Hey uhh...Light?"  
>"Yes Hope?"<em>

_She turned to me with a warm smile, holding my birthday present in her hands. It wasn't large at all, about the size of a book. She walked up to me and handed it to me._

_"Happy birthday Hope!"_

_She handed me the present and gave me a warm hug. I opened it and it was a small photo album. It had a picture of the Farron family on the cover. I grasped it firmly._

_"Thanks Light..."  
>"You're welcome,"<br>"Light...can I ask you something?"  
>"Sure,"<br>"If I said...I wanted to ask you out somewhere, what would you say?"_

_Lightning's eyes widened. She wasn't sure she was hearing correctly. Was the now 19 year old Hope really asking her out?_

_"Hope? You really want that?"  
>"Y-Y-Yeah...I r-r-really do..."<em>

_She blushed slightly._

_"I'll tell you what, on your 20th birthday, I promise I will,"  
>"Why then?"<br>"Hope, I'm 26 years old...if you're 20 it really won't be a legal issue,"_

_He knew she was right when she said that; curse those stupid pedophilia laws._

_"Will you seriously?"_

_She smiled at him and responded with a small kiss on his forehead._

_"I promise"_

That day finally came. I was now 20 years old. She was right beside me as I drove towards Palumpolum downtown in the new car my dad got for my birthday. She was really happy about it. I thought for sure she would've forgotten that promise but I was gravely mistaken.

_"Happy birthday big guy!"_

_Snow gave me a firm handshake. I couldn't believe I stood half a head taller than Lightning at my 20th birthday. She seemed surprised at my growth spurt. She approached me and smiled her warm smile. I don't know what it was but there was just something about her that whenever she smiled, I would feel at peace and I would feel safe in saying anything on my mind._

_"Hope, I think I promised you something for your birthday,"_

_I looked at her in disbelief. Was she really serious?_

"Where did you learn to drive?"

I snapped out of my thoughts.

"Oh...my dad taught me,"  
>"How's the medicine going?"<p>

I smiled.

"Still at the top of my class,"

I started going to college when I was 17 and I was ready to graduate with my degree in Biology. She was there for me every step of the way...in her own way of course. She would check on me every week and she would visit once in a while to ensure everything was fine.

"That's good, so where are we going?"  
>"A park, it's a place that I've been going ever since I was a kid,"<br>"You still are one,"

I chuckled and she smiled.

"That's not nice Light,"  
>"It's true, you're still 7 years younger than me,"<p>

I sighed in defeat; I hated when she was right.

"Why is it so special?"  
>"Because I have a lot of good memories there,"<p>

She nodded.

"I take it you went with your mother there a lot?"  
>"Yeah...this was her favorite place,"<p>

Lightning held my free hand.

"She'd be very proud of you,"  
>"Thanks..."<p>

It wasn't long before we arrived. I hoped that she would enjoy this trip just as much I would; I have so many good memories here and having a good one with her here would make this place that much more special to me; she was probably the most important person to me in the world right now besides my dad. Together, we made our way towards the park.


	2. Another Fond Memory

Chapter 2- Another Fond Memory

We walked to the lake and sat under a tree. This was the very same spot my mom and I used to sit under long ago. We chose here because it gave the best view of the water. Lightning sat beside me, looking almost as if she were hypnotized by the view.

"Your mom's right, beautiful view here,"  
>"This was our favorite spot for a reason,"<br>"Ice cream here!"

I turned to see one of the vendors walking around. I raised a hand.

"Want one?"  
>"Sure,"<p>

I paid him for two, Lightning grabbing strawberry while I took chocolate. I had never seen her so at ease before. She was usually so serious but for some reason, I didn't feel that vibe at all from her today.

"Can I taste that?"

I looked at her and she had her eyes on my cone.

"Sure,"

She leaned over and took an excrutiatingly slow lick. I was thoroughly convinced she was teasing me on purpose but I managed to hide my anxiety. She moved away and smirked.

"My turn,"

I stole a lick from hers and she pouted.

"You know strawberry is my favorite,"  
>"Equivalent exchange,"<p>

She narrowed her eyes in an unamused fashion and I laughed at her. She started laughing too. We finished our cones and she shifted closer to me. I opened my arms, hoping that she would accept. She looked at me and smiled before she scooted into my lap and I locked my arms around her stomach in a warm embrace. She smelt _**amazing**_.

"You're so warm Hope,"  
>"Why, are you cold?"<br>"Well, it is winter..."

I chuckled at her; Palumpolum was way colder than where she lived in Bodhum. There were only three weaknesses I could see in her: her insatiable love for anything strawberry flavored, her inability to take cold temperatures and her funny but sometimes mean jokes. She leaned more into me and leaned her head back to face me.

"So are you having a good birthday so far?"  
>"Yeah...this is probably the best one I've ever had,"<p>

She smiled.

"I'm glad,"

Suddenly, she appeared in much greater detail, like a TV switching from normal to Blu-Ray quality. She seemed much more beautiful than before and I felt my heart rate increasing. I knew I liked her ever since I turned 18.

_"Hey Light, long time no see,"  
>"How've you been Hope?"<em>

_I hugged her and she happily returned the gesture._

_"College, its been hard,"  
>"But you're acing everything right?"<em>

_She knew me all too well and I smirked._

_"You know it,"_

_She made a sound between a laugh and a scoff. I for some reason could not take my eyes off of her. I have no idea why my heart suddenly sped up and my body felt so much warmer. Was I beginning to...like her? I always thought she would be like a mother or a big sister to me, but my mind really began to tell me otherwise as I struggled to maintain my composure in front of her as she spoke about her work. _

_There was definitely not much to __**dislike**__ about her. She was a strong woman and the kind of person who would kill to make sure that everything was alright just for you. She was in her own unique way, nice. Sure she could be harsh and mean at times, but in the end she really means well. She was beautiful, with her flawless face, athletic figure and a look that was just so...__**Lightning**__ and nothing else could come even remotely close to matching her. Even her lips looked perfect..._

_"Hope? Are you alright? You look a little lost there,"_

_I snapped out of my thoughts._

_"Oh sorry Light, I was thinking about something,"_

_She nodded._

I held her closer to me when I remembered how much she meant to me.

"Hope? Is everything ok?"

My hair blocked my face as my head leaned over her shoulder.

"I'm just really glad you're here with me,"

She smiled and held my hands.

"I'm not going anywhere, I promise,"  
>"Same,"<p> 


	3. Call Me Claire

Chapter 3- Call Me Claire

Hope finally reached my house after that long drive. I was really happy to spend the day with him. I loved seeing him so happy and so at ease; he deserves it after all he's been through. Losing his mother and having to maintain a 4.0 GPA to ensure financial aid completely covers his school expenses due to his father being unable to work due to his sickness. I was surprised Bartholomew was able to get Hope the car he now drives.

"Thanks for the awesome birthday,"

"Anytime,"

He smiled at me and my heart jumped again. There was just something about him that let me able to let down my guard. If it were any other guy, I'd be a completely different person. I know I wouldn't be smiling as much as I do with him, I know I wouldn't let anyone touch me like him and I know I wouldn't allow them to get close enough for me to want to protect them.

"Hope? Do you want to stay over? Its a really far drive from here to home,"

"Uhh...are you sure it's alright?"

"It's fine,"

Out of nowhere, Serah appeared with an innocent smile on her face.

"We have a guest room and you're always welcome here,"

"Thanks Serah..."

She winked at him and walked away. He went to his car and picked up a bag.

"Guess I'm staying here for a few days then,"

"You can stay as long as you want to,"

He smiled at me.

"Thanks Light,"

He walked inside before I showed him to his room. He put his bag and joined us for dinner. As usual, he and Snow were the comedians of the table, making me and Serah laugh to our hearts content. It was soon time for our usual serious talk, where we would tell each other what's bothering us. As usual, nothing bothered Serah and Snow almost always had an annoyance with one of the NORA members. Hope however, revealed that his dad was sick. He was sure that it wasn't anything serious so he paid no attention to it apart from checking in every few days. He was nice enough to wash everything after dinner before he returned the room. I followed him in.

"Everything ok?"

"Yeah...thanks for everything Light,"

I smiled at him.

"Call me Claire,"

His eyes widened.

"A-A-Alright...C-Claire,"

He must've known I don't let just anyone call me by my real name. If I allowed you to call me by my real name, it meant that you were either family or even closer than that. I left the room, leaving him to ponder at what just happened in his own words.


	4. Almost

Chapter 4- Almost

I decided to cook dinner for them after they let me stay for a few days. I've been here 4 days and I can honestly say that I've gotten closer to everyone, especially Serah. She was a very interesting girl and you'd wonder how she could be related Light considering the large facade she puts on to be tough and emotionless. Light and I got closer too, to the point where we would spend all of our free time together. It didn't matter what we were doing; it was fine if we did it together. I refused any help from anyone in cooking today; I really wanted to show them how much I appreciate everything they've done for me.

"Smells good,"

Light walked into the room and sat at the island in the middle of the kitchen. She was wearing a pink tanktop and form fitting jeans. Her hair was also pinned up.

"Hope you like it,"

"Pun intended?"

I chuckled and she smiled; her sense of humor definitely got better as the days went by. She walked beside me and examined what I was doing.

"Where'd you learn to cook?"

"Food Network,"

She laughed.

"Can I help?"

I told Serah and Snow no already and it really pained me to do this.

"I would love if you did, but I gotta do it on my own,"

"Why?"

"It's my way of giving back,"

She understood immediately. She turned to walk away. As long as I've known her, I've never known Light to be clumsy but I suppose a slip can happen to anyone. I didn't realize a little soapy water was on the floor and a wet cloth was hidden beneath the cloudy shell and she slipped. I stepped aside, dropping whatever I was doing to catch her but I was no ninja. I ended up falling too with her landing on me. She really wasn't that heavy at all; the fall to the floor hurt a lot more than her falling on me. She looked up at me as I sat up. I couldn't move, my head and face were frozen in place when she gave me the most concerned look on her face.

"Did...I hurt you?"

"N-N-No, n-not at all..."

She didn't seem convinced.

"The floor hurt more than you did, you're as light as a feather, pun intended,"

She started to laugh.

"I told you that you can call me by my real name now,"

"I know, I'm just so used to calling you Light that I haven't adjusted to that privilege,"

I didn't realize how close her face was until I opened my eyes from laughing nervously. Her eyes were filled with love and care. Her hands were on either side of me and her upper body leaned toward my own straightened one. Her hair somehow managed to unpin itself during the chaos of the fall. She looked so..._**immaculate**_. I felt my throat go dry and my legs refused to move as she was on them. My face began to shift closer against my will. I knew doing this now was as great an opportunity as any but...I was hesitant. I wasn't quite sure how she felt about me yet...I mean she kisses my cheek and forehead so much that we'd might as well be dating but she had never mentioned interest in doing so. Her eyes narrowed and she moved closer. She was too close. I could make out every detail of her beautiful sapphire eyes and count every eyelash on her eyelids.

"Hope! Phone call!"

Damn it...all I could say was damn it. Son of a bitch! What a time to get a phone call!

I sadly looked to her and she understood as she leaned off of me to let me get up. I quickly left the room in order to prevent further awkwardness. I held the phone to my ear.

"Hello?"

_"Yes, is this Hope Estheim?"_

"Yes, can I help you?"

_"I'm sorry...your father, Bartholomew Estheim just passed away..."_

The phone fell out of my hand and my knees gave way like a string breaking from the weight of an elephant. My days officially went straight to hell from that moment.


	5. Overcoming Sorrow Itself

Chapter 5- Overcoming Sorrow Itself

I don't think I had any tears left within my eyes. I spent the next week mourning my father. Light and the others left me alone to give me time to myself. I couldn't believe he was gone and he went one month before my graduation. I had been going to school while staying with them but I couldn't concentrate; my dad was all I had left...now I'm the only Estheim left in this world. I'm the only survivor in my entire family...

"Hope, it's me, can I come in?"

It was Light. I needed someone with me now; there was no way I could keep my sanity like this.

"Come in..."

She walked in and sat beside me. She noticed my baggy eyes and my distraught appearance. She looked horrified.

"Hope...are you feeling any better?"

"A little bit..."

She didn't seem convinced.

"I just can't believe he's gone Light...he told me he was fine,"

"He probably said that so you could keep your grades up, having that sort of thing on your mind during college isn't exactly helpful,"

She was right; I should've been able to tell something was amiss. My head lowered and I dropped my pen which I was using to finish my last paper. She looked at the paper and smiled.

"You're a really brilliant writer; I think you should write books when you graduate,"

She had looked at my papers before and said the same thing but this time, I knew she said it also because she wanted me to feel better. At this point, I knew she was prepared to do anything to make me feel better.

"Thanks,"

I rose from the desk and sat on the bed and she joined me. My head lowered and she immediately enveloped me in a warm, loving embrace.

"Hope...I'm here for you...don't cry..."

I felt the pain within her. She may not be related to me but she too knew the pain of losing parents. She knew what it felt like to be alone. Serah and her are all that's left of their family excluding Snow who was now Serah's husband. She didn't want me to feel the pain and I knew if she could, she'd take the pain onto herself if that's what it took to make me feel better.

"Thanks…"

I held her closer to me because I could feel her own sadness creeping up on her. She was trying her absolute best to remain calm for me but she was losing that battle. I had to do something for her.

"Light?"

She leaned back and looked at me to see me smiling.

"I'm alright now, you made me feel better, thank you,"

She seemed convinced and she once again pressed my head to her body and wrapped her loving arms around me.

"I'm sorry this had to happen Hope, I know it's hard but you have to keep pushing on, it's what your dad would want for you,"  
>"I know,"<br>"Promise me you won't be sad anymore?"

I took a deep breath; I knew that was a promise that if I made, I probably wouldn't be able to keep.

"I…don't think I can keep that promise…I'm alone now Light…"  
>"You're never alone; you have Serah, Snow and me,"<p>

I nodded my head; they were my family now.

"Ok…I promise,"

She smiled.

"Light…what happened to your parents?"

She seemed a little distraught but she seemed to shake it away, almost as if she was forcing herself to tell me.

"If you don't feel comfortable in telling me, you can tell me another day,"  
>"No I'm comfortable with it, it's just that I haven't been asked that question in about ten years,"<p>

Then began her explanation of what happened to her parents. She had no idea how her mom died because it was a disease that was unknown and her dad was killed by Cie'th. She continued to explain why she changed her name and what happened to her and Serah during the time she had to raise Serah on her own. She told me about them already but I had to let her get it off her chest; she was an inch from losing her cool.

"Hey Light,"  
>"Yes?"<br>"I'm here for you too...okay?"

She smiled at me and she finally let the tears come from her eyes. It was my turn to comfort her as she finally let out her sadness.

"I'm here Light..."

She continued to cry softly and I continued to hold her close, hushing her and stroking her hair gently. She didn't deserve the hard life she had to go through and she and I weren't all that different; we both lost our parents and an early age and we both know how it feels to be alone. She finally stopped crying and I wiped her tears away with the cloth in my shirt pocket. I smiled at here.

"Do me a favor and keep smiling, you're beautiful when you smile,"

She blushed lightly and I smiled again at her. She did as I asked and to my surprise, she kissed my cheek.

"Thank you Hope,"

She rose to her feet and began to walk out.

"How about we go out again tomorrow?"

She turned back to me.

"I'd love that,"

She left the room. I sighed in relief. I helped her overcome sorrow itself and she did the same for me. The light that wasn't at the end of the tunnel suddenly reappeared in my life...pun intended.


	6. Coming To Terms

Chapter 5- Coming To Terms

"Thanks for the good time,"

"Did we really just say that at the same time?"

I laughed at him. We had just gotten back from town after a nice night out. Hope decided to take me to a bowling alley and then to dinner right afterwards and I had to say that this was the best night out I've had in a long time; the depressing moments that were yesterday seemed like a distant memory now. It was a really good thing he made this suggestion to have fun for once; the stress of work in addition to all the horrible memories of the past just added unnecessary pain to both our lives.

I knew it wasn't like me to break down like that in front of him and to this very moment I'm hitting myself for doing so considering the role I know I'm supposed to play but to be honest, Hope is the only person I trust enough to reveal what really goes on beneath the cold facade I try to put on everyday. Hope was probably the only person besides Serah who has ever seen me in my vulnerable state. I was glad I was able to let it out though...it was a long time since I was able to vent my emotions and also feel safe in doing so.

We changed and went into my room. I didn't want to let him sleep alone after yesterday. He showered and already changed and went into bed. He was probably tired; the intense bowling games that he and I played probably tired him out.

"Feeling better?"

He looked at me and smiled.

"Yeah, loads better, thanks again,"

I smiled and climbed into bed.

"Listen Hope...I have something to say,"  
>"You know that you can tell me anything on your mind Light,"<p>

He still called me that but I didn't mind; he grew up using that name and it would take a while for him to get used to it.

"I'm sorry for...breaking down last night,"  
>"Why are you sorry for that?"<br>"Because I was supposed to be the strong person, you're the one who is supposed to be feeling the pain, not me,"  
>"My bad time probably triggered your bottled up feelings, there's nothing wrong with that Light..."<br>"But,"  
>"No buts, look you did fine yesterday and it's not really good to keep stuff like that bottled up inside, its better to get it off your chest,"<p>

He was right; I was overthinking about everything that happened. He didn't mind listening to me and I'm sure he'd do it again in a heartbeat. He sat up and opened his arms. I smiled and embraced him. We turned in for the night.

_"Who would've thought you could be so affectionate Light,"_

_I laughed softly._

_"I'm not usually but I guess I'm getting soft,"  
>"Is that really a bad thing?"<em>

_He looked a little serious._

_"No, it's not because now I can do this..."_

_I quickly moved in and pecked his lips. He seemed to be frozen in time when the small contact was made. I don't know what came over me to do that. I have no idea why I did it either. I turned to go back to sleep but he held my hand and had a passionate look on his face. His right hand found it's way to my cheek and he slowly moved in and kissed me. My eyes opened wide as he kept the contact locked for what seemed to be ages but was really about 7 seconds. He stopped kissing me and he saw my shocked face._

_"I love you Light, don't ever be sad again, I'll take your pain for you if I have to just so I don't have to see you frown ever again,"_

_The first three words played in slow motion to me. Does he...really love me? He leaned in again._

"Hey Light, Serah told me to wake you up, it's 12 right now,"

I opened my eyes. Was that really just a dream? How can something that felt so real vanish like that? It was just then that I came to terms with why I've been behaving so differently...I was starting to fall in love with Hope Estheim.


	7. Author's Note

**Hello readers and writers. I wanted to say sorry for the bad quality work. Lately, I haven't had access to a computer to write my fanfics so I've been making do with a word processor on my phone, which is why there was a bunch of overlooked gramatical errors and also why it wasn't as long as usual. I'm going to re-edit all of the chapters, making corrections and maybe add more content to the chapters. **

**Keep a lookout readers! Sorry again!**

**Wandering Letters.**


	8. Graduation

Chapter 7- Graduation

I finally made it; it was time to leave UOP (University Of Palompolum). I was nervous of course as I stood in my robe and hat looking nervously into the mirror. I didn't really make that many friends here so it wasn't like I had encouraing words around me to calm me down. I waited in line nervously as the headmaster called name after name.

"Hope Estheim,"

I walked up nervously because I knew that in addition to receiving my degree, I had to make a speech because I graduated at the head of the class. I looked towards the camera and noticed the presence of the Farrons. Light was smiling and clapping with the audience and suddenly, the weight of the eyes on me became like that of a feather. If I knew she was proud of me, I didn't feel the fear. I took my seat and waited for my time to speak.

"And now, our top student of our institution, Hope Estheim will say a few words,"

He invited me to the stage and I made my way to it.

"Good evening everyone and thank you all for coming for this celebration and ceremony,"

Light's eyes didn't leave me for a second.

"It was a really difficult road to get here, a lot of work, blood, sweat and tears but we, the graduating class have finally done it and we're ready to give back to our society in our own way,"

She smiled.

"I'd like to thank all of the professors for a job well done, I'd like to thank all the students I've worked with and I'd like to thank all my friends and family for being there for me when I needed them, there's no way I could've done it without all of you,"

I paused and swallowed a breath of air.

"I'd like to take a moment also to give special thanks to my father, who is no longer with us, he passed away three weeks prior to this event and he is the one who raised me and got me to where I stand now,"

The crowd gasped when I said that and they immediately turned deathly silent when I bowed my head in respect to my dad. It really wasn't in my place to make such a selfish remark but the crowd seemed to understand.

"Thank you everyone again for coming and on behalf of the graduating class, we thank you for being there for us every step of our journey,"

I stepped down from the podium and the entire crowd went absolutely nuts. I retook my seat and I found a number of the female students looking at me with admiring eyes. One in particular, named Liona was looking at me and she seemed very interested. After we did the traditional hat tossing, I started to make my way towards the Farrons before Liona grabbed my hand.

"Can I talk to you for a second Hope?"

Me being the gentleman I am, I nodded and followed her. She brought me to the entrance of the sports center where no one was around.

"I've always wanted to tell you something,"  
>"What's that?"<br>"I've been watching you for a while and I never thought you would've made it at the top of our class,"  
>"I worked hard at it,"<p>

She nodded.

"I know and I guess you were just better than me,"

She ironically came second right behind me.

"I was wondering...if you were busy tomorrow, I got two tickets to see a movie tomorrow and I wanted to know if you wanted to go with me,"

I couldn't deny that I wanted to immediately decline simply because of Light. I however began to think. I've lived with them for about 3 months now and nothing has really gone on between me and her besides us getting closer. Liona was also a good person. She was very pretty with her long brown hair and her dark green eyes in addition to the gorgeous body she developed from the 4 years of swimming she did at school. She wasn't a bad person though I couldn't help but think that if I didn't graduate at the top of the class, she would never have noticed me.

"Sure, I'd love to, what time and where do you what me to pick you up"  
>"You have a car?"<p>

I pointed to the vehicle behind us and she seemed impressed. She wrote her address down on a stray post-it from one of her books and handed it to me.

"7 pm is fine,"  
>"Alright, I'll be there,"<br>"Nice meeting you Hope,"

She began to walk away.

"You too,"

What in the blue hell did I just do by accepting that?


	9. A Different Path

Chapter 8- A Different Path

We arrived at the house and I still couldn't help but feel so proud of him. He was a man now and all he has to do is get through medical school and he can be on his own. I didn't mind him living with us at all for the past 3 months. He didn't give us any problems apart from the occasional late night in which we had to force him to bed. He was such a good person and watching him succeed like this really makes me happy. He volunteered to cook dinner again and he made a great one: a roasted turkey, lasagna and garlic mashed potatoes. His cooking skills improved considerably after he watched Serah cook a few times and from Food Network. Once again, he didn't cease to impress.

I decided to walk inside afterwards while he was drying up the dishes. I noticed he had barely said a word to me at the table which was unlike him.

"Hey is everything ok?"

He turned and smiled.

"Yeah why?"  
>"You haven't really said much so I thought you might've had something on your mind,"<p>

He seemed to beam at me but he calmed down.

"Well...there is actually,"  
>"Want to talk about it?"<p>

He quickly put away the last plate, once again leaving the kitchen practically spotless and took a seat at the island with me.

"Well, I got invited to a movie by this girl at graduation,"

I felt a tinge of jealousy creep up my back.

"I'm just thinking...what are her intentions? Is it because I'm the top of the class? Apart from that sole reason, I doubt a popular girl like her would notice me in school,"

I nodded in comprehension; he was looking at this very logically which was good.

"Well, go ahead and have fun,"

I felt like I shot myself when I said that.

"Thanks Light,"

There was a hollowness in his voice, almost as if he wanted me to tell him no. He walked away to turn in for the night before I went to Serah in the living room.

"Hi Claire, something wrong?"  
>"Not really,"<p>

My sister knew me all too well.

"Don't lie to me, I know when something's wrong,"  
>"Then why ask?"<br>"Because admitting it helps more,"

Just like Serah, always the smart one and the motherly one. I sometimes wondered if my motherly instincts still existed only because she was around to trigger them.

"Is it about Hope?"

I kept silent and she took my hand before sitting us both down on the couch.

"What happened?"  
>"He was asked out by one of the girls at the graduation,"<br>"And what's wrong with that?"

My eyes widened slightly.

"Claire...are you jealous?"

My face felt warm and Serah smiled.

"You like Hope don't you?"

I let my hair fall over my eyes to hide my embarrassed expression.

"It's about time you found someone; I was beginning to think that no one was good enough for you,"

I put an unamused look on my face.

"Does Hope like this girl?"  
>"Not to my knowledge, it looks like she just met him at the graduation,"<br>"Does Hope like you?"

I froze because I really couldn't answer that question. I was tempted to say yes but that was partially wishful thinking. For all I knew, Hope could just view me as a mother, sister or even just a close friend.

"I...don't know,"  
>"Well you have to find out, that's the first step,"<br>"How?"  
>"Give him hints and see if he responds to them,"<p>

I looked at her, confusion clear in my expression. Serah sighed but laughed.

"You have a lot to learn about men Claire, that's the one thing that you don't have much, if any at all, experience in,"

Serah took me by the hand and led me into her room. I felt like I should've just tried to solve this myself instead of going to her. I also felt like she just gave me completely useless advice.

I'm an idiot.


	10. Irresistible Urge

Chapter 8- Irresistible Urge

I finally got back from the movie with Liona. I had to admit, she was a great person. I expected her to be a snob and to be full of herself but she was actually very humble. That aside, tonight was a mix of amazing but I probably just made a bad move in agreeing to this in the first place.

_I walked with her to the ticket booth and got us in quickly. She chose to sit in the back. I quickly went and got food and drinks for both of us and rejoined her before the movie started. To be honest, the movie wasn't very interesting, not compared to her. _

_She was talking about all the things she did in school and how great it was to finally be able to give back to her family after they made the financial sacrifices to allow her to go. Even though she was talking about herself, she wasn't speaking in the self-conceited manner, it was more of an enlightening, as if I was the first and the most important person she was telling this to._

_She continued on to even ask me about my goals. I told her everything and she seemed impressed. Soon, the movie was over but she didn't seem like she wanted to leave me just yet. We got into my car but she continued to talk._

_"Hope, would you mind if we just sat here and talked? I don't want to go home just yet,"_

_"Oh, sure no problem,"_

_She continued, telling me about her childhood and family and all there was to know about her. I even discovered that despite being a "popular" girl, she didn't date anyone throughout high school nor college. She was going to move onto medical school as well only that she wanted to be a pediatrician and I wanted to be a diagnostic doctor, kinda like a Gregory House type job._

_"Oh, so we're gonna see a series called Estheim M.D?"_

_I chuckled._

_"Yeah, only difference is that it's the real deal,"_

_She smiled at me. I began to drive towards her house._

_"So when are you going to medical school?"  
><em>_"August, right after summer,"  
><em>_"Which one?"  
><em>_"New Bodhum,"  
><em>_"Oh...I'm going to be in Pulse,"  
><em>_"That's a long way from home,"  
><em>_"Yeah no kidding,"_

_She seemed a little sad. I had to do something to brighten the mood up a bit._

_"Hey, we have a long summer ahead of us, let's enjoy it as much as we can,"_

_She turned to me, smiling slightly._

_"Always an optimist aren't you,"  
><em>_"At times,"_

_She seemed to think for a brief moment before she spoke again._

_"At the speech, you said your dad passed away, can I ask what happened to him?"  
><em>_"Disease, I don't know what because I haven't been home to check,"  
><em>_"Oh...so he was in the hospital?"  
><em>_"He wasn't that bad when I left, it looked like a simple cold,"_

_My eyes involuntarily narrowed. She held my free hand._

_"I'm sorry, it's probably still a shaky topic for you,"  
><em>_"No it's alright, I'm just trying to forget about it,"_

_If she only knew how many bad memories she sent rushing back to me. I pulled up to her house and walked her to the door._

_"Thanks for the ride and the awesome night,"  
><em>_"No problem,"_

_She smiled at me and to my surprise, she gave me a kiss on my cheek. She had to tip toe to reach my face._

_"Stop frowning, you're handsome when you're happy,"_

_My hand ghosted over the cheek that she just kissed and my hair hid my eyes from view. She turned to walk in but my hand snapped and held hers gently, urging her to stay a little longer. As soon as she turned, it was as if an ultra powerful magnet just brought me to her and I couldn't stop myself from kissing her. One day of knowing her and I was doing this? WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?_

_I knew this was wrong, I knew I shouldn't be doing this but my body was on auto-pilot. Why couldn't Light at least show me a sign that she liked me back? Why couldn't she? Was it really that hard to say three words to the only other man that you know and care about? Maybe if she gave me a sign I wouldn't be doing this now..._

_She started to kiss back, wrapping her arms around my neck and pressing herself against me. I had to admit, she knew how to kiss someone and she knew how to express her feelings through her actions. I stopped kissing her and panted softly. She was doing so as well. _

_"Wow..."_

_She was in total awe at what just happened._

_"I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me,"  
><em>_"No...it's ok,"_

_She held my cheek with one of her hands and stroked it._

_"I'll see you around?"_

_I smiled._

_"Yeah you will,"_

_She smiled and walked inside._

_What the hell did I just do?..._

"You're home late there buddy,"

I turned to see Snow with a cup in his hand.

"Are the girls asleep?"  
>"Light's still up,"<br>"This long?"  
>"She was waiting up for you,"<p>

I felt guilty coming back so late and that got quadrupled after what I just did with Liona.

"Had a good time?"  
>"Yeah, pretty good,"<p>

He smiled.

"So is that chick you took with you your new girlfriend?"  
>"Well...no,"<br>"How come? What happened?"

I couldn't tell him what I did and I for damn sure couldn't tell him my feelings for Light.

"Nothing happened,"  
>"Oh, so I guess it was a drag then?"<br>"Yeah, pretty much,"  
>"Tough luck bud, here I was hoping you'd come home beaming and grinning,"<p>

He walked off to sleep. I returned to Light's room to let her know everything was ok before going off to sleep myself.


	11. Just Out Of Reach

Chapter 10- Just Out Of Reach

It was one year after that fateful night with Liona. I started dating her on the second date and I was happy...well for the most part. I knew my feelings for Light wouldn't go away anytime soon so I did my best to ignore. For the first time...my best wasn't good enough. My feelings endured and plagued me for that entire year but Liona was always there to comfort me...though I always lied about the reason. I was hitting the punching bag downstairs until my phone went off.

"Hey,"

_"Hope...I want to talk to you, can I come over?"_

It was Liona and she sounded distressed.

"Alright sure,"

She hung up and reached the house in five minutes. She seemed...sad. I embraced her and led her to the tree outside so we could talk in private.

"Hope...I have some good news and some bad news,"  
>"Good news first,"<p>

She smiled slightly.

"I got accepted at the university in Pulse and I got a full scholarship,"  
>"That's great news!"<p>

I picked her up and swung her around. She started laughing and held me tightly.

"You're gonna live your dream!"

She stopped laughing when I put her down.

"That brings me to the bad news..."

I kept silent.

"I have to be there for eight years...and I can't visit you..."  
>"What?"<br>"The grade of work that the university is intense...I'm going to need every second of those eight years to get through it...I can't...I can't be with you anymore Hope...I tried to put it off as long as possible for you...for us...but I can't anymore,"  
>"But...what about-"<br>"I can't stand long distance relationships Hope...eight years of being unable to see you is way too much for me to stand...it's better if..."  
>"I understand..."<p>

She looked at me. My face had turned cold and emotionless.

"I leave tomorrow for Pulse; I have to get everything in order,"  
>"So you're spending your last day with me?"<p>

She nodded and I forced myself to smile.

"At least I have that,"

She hugged me.

"I'm sorry Hope...I'm so sorry..."  
>"You'll do great there,"<p>

She smiled.

"Thank you...for being with me...you showed me that there are truly good people in this world..."  
>"I gave you hope?"<p>

She giggled.

"Yes, you did..."  
>"I'm glad I was able to..."<p>

I led her inside. I knew that after this day, I wouldn't ever see her again. She would find someone in Pulse who can truly be with her and make her happy. I knew that after today...I would be alone...again.


	12. Passing The Torch

Chapter 11- Passing The Torch

I felt sad. I felt as sad as any woman who would never see the one she loved again. I didn't want things to be this way...but my journey had to continue in Pulse. I knew that Hope was hiding his sadness underneath those laughs he did when Snow was telling his jokes. He had taken me to meet his new family and all of them were wonderful people. Hope always spoke about one person in particular...Lightning.

"Hey Liona, think fast!"

I looked up and caught a pillow thrown at me by Serah. Even though we were all adults, we tended to unleash our childish sides whenever we were around each other. Pillow fights, making smores, all of those activities we did together and they treated me as if I were a part of the family. Even after Hope told them that I was leaving, they understood the pain and I knew they were trying extra hard to ease the pain of having to leave him. I was worried most about Hope though.

Lightning seemed like the person who was best able to comfort him during his times of need and she also seemed like the person he loved most out of the three. I really wondered if my hunch was true.

"Hey Lightning,"

She turned to face me, stopping her task of washing the dishes after we just finished dinner.

"Can I talk to you for a second?"

"Sure,"

She left the dishes which Hope immediately continued. I took her outside and sat down with her.

"Can I ask you a personal question?"  
>"It depends,"<br>"It's about Hope,"  
>"Long distance relationships?"<p>

She didn't let me say anything before she started to explain.

"It's not about that...I want to know...how you feel about him,"

She seemed shocked.

"Why does that matter?"  
>"Because he loves you,"<br>"What?"

I took a breath.

"For the entire year I was with him, he always spoke so highly of you, he would always say how Lightning did this and Lightning did that, it would always be about you, you'd have to be blind to see that he doesn't have feelings for you,"  
>"If he had feelings for me then why did he choose to date you?"<br>"Because I asked first,"

She again seemed shocked.

"When I first asked him out, I knew he accepted out of courtesy and he wanted to get to know me, but that night when he kissed me, it wasn't completely because he had feelings for me, it was because he was desperate,"

She raised an eyebrow.

"One day and he has feelings for you?"  
>"It's because we have a similar background, on top of that his dad was still on his mind and he needed the comfort, so I gave him that comfort,"<br>"So then why not keep the relationship?"  
>"Because he'd be much happier with you than he would with me,"<br>"You don't know that,"

I clenched a fist.

"Don't you get it? He needs you!"  
>"If he truly needed me, he wouldn't have picked you over me,"<br>"He didn't think you loved him back! You didn't show him a sign otherwise he wouldn't have been so faithful to me!"

She froze.

"If he knew you loved him back, he would've never said yes in the first place, he probably wouldn't have continued to date me either! You didn't show him any signs and now when I have to break it off, you're going to pretend as if he was the wrong person? What's the matter with you?"  
>"He could've asked."<br>"Hope did everything he could've, if he asked then what would you have told him that night?"

Her eyes narrowed.

"Did he ask you if it was alright to go with me to that movie that night one year ago?"

She froze once more and nodded.

"That was a sign! If you told him no then he would've believed he had a chance with you but you told him to go! It's all your fault!"  
>"What difference does it make?"<br>"It matters because he still loves you! I love him too but I can't be there for him, you can!"  
>"So what are you doing, passing the torch?"<br>"So to speak yes,"

I rose to my feet.

"You can make him more happy than I ever can Lightning, it's your choice to believe me or not but the feelings he has for you are stronger than the ones he has for me by multiples,"  
>"Do...you really think he does?"<p>

From the moment she said that, I understood why she couldn't say anything; she was just as unsure, if not more than he was. It was her first time doing this too.

"Be there for him...he's going to think he's alone in this world now..."  
>"Thank you Liona..."<p>

I smiled.

"Make him happy...please...he deserves it after all he's been through,"

Lightning hugged me after she saw the tears in my eyes. If I was staying, there's no way I would leave him unless he didn't want me anymore. Unlike me, she would always be there to take his sadness away.

Night came sooner than I had wanted and it was time for me to go. He volunteered to drive me home and Lightning came with us too. We reached my door in minutes and he walked with me, hand in hand. I turned to him and his face was devoid of happiness.

"Will I ever see you again?"  
>"You will, someday, I promise..."<br>"I'll always be with you..."

He removed one of the chains he was wearing and placed it in my hand. It was the very same one I first saw him with and the one I complimented on our first date.

"Keep it..."  
>"Hope..."<br>"I'll always be your friend Liona..."

I hugged him tightly and kissed him. He couldn't kiss back with the happiness I hoped for but I knew deep down below all of the sadness, he was glad that I got a chance to live my dream and the last thing he'd do is take that happiness away.

I parted from him and Lightning waved goodbye. It was up to her to make him happy now. He got back into the car with her and drove away. It was time for me to move on and for him to find his true happiness because I knew it wasn't with me.


	13. Enlightened

Chapter 12- Enlightened

"Hey, you okay?"

I turned to see Light. She must've been worried about me when I didn't say a word to anyone when we came back. The look on my face probably didn't help either.

She joined me on the bed.

"Something on your mind?"

I looked at her, slightly scared.

"Not really..."

I knew it was a horrible lie but for some reason, she seemed to buy it, either that or she didn't want to press.

"Why are you up so late?"  
>"I wanted to talk to you about something,"<br>"Sure, what's on your mind?"

She sat down beside me. I was hesitant...no, _**very **_hesitant. She seemed to sense my distress.

"You can talk to me about anything, you know that,"

I swallowed some air.

"I want to hear what you have to say...don't be afraid..."

I cursed under my breath.

"Well...it's a question,"  
>"What is it?"<p>

The door opened and Serah was standing there.

"Hope, your phone's ringing,"

She must've been asleep and the phone woke her up. I took the phone from her and answered it. I cut off the call even though it was one of the school recordings telling me information.

"Why did you-"  
>"I want to say what's on my mind first; school can wait until morning,"<p>

I swallowed hard again and took a deep breath.

"Light...what are your feelings...for me?"

She froze at those words, as if she was praying to The Maker that I wouldn't ask that question. She looked at me.

"You first, I promise I'll answer you if you tell me first,"

I looked at her before I held held her hand before looking down after taking a sharp breath.

"You, it's been you ever since I first met you...,"

My eyes widened. I can't believe I just said that. It took me so long to admit it. I really still had feelings for her, even after a long year with Liona. I still had a crush on her that persisted for seven years? That had to be strong feelings.

"I didn't want to tell you Light...not after everything that-"

Her hand went to my chin and she turned my head up to face her. I was struggling to hold back tears. This was one of the few times in which I was completely scared out of my wits.

"Hope...After hearing that…I don't think I can tell you what's on my mind...but I can show it to you,"

Before I could object, she leaned towards me and connected our lips. I was utterly shocked. Could she really forgive me after betraying her like that so easily? I moved away from her and hid my face from her.

"No...why did you wait so long...why did you Light..."  
>"Hope…it's-"<br>"No listen please..."

She held my hands and nodded for me to go on. She probably knew all of this already but if I didn't get it off my chest, I knew that I wouldn't be able to forgive myself.

"I...was waiting for you to give me a sign Light...I had always thought that even if it was just a little, that you liked me back..."

I could tell she felt guilty for not doing so earlier.

"But then you told me to have fun at the movie so I took it as a sign that you didn't...I know I shouldn't have and I should've known you would've said that because you'd put my happiness before anything else...even before your own,"

I removed my hands from hers and got up to leave.

"I'm sorry I betrayed you Light...I don't deserve your love,"  
>"Shut up,"<p>

I looked at her. Her hair blocked her face and judging from the sound of her voice, her teary eyes as well.

"Don't you dare say that ever again,"

I was confused. What was she getting at now?

"There's not a man alive that deserves a chance more than you...you're the only one Hope...you're the only man I've ever felt this way about..."

I sat down and scooted close to her before lifting her head to face me. She turned away, not wanting me to see her so vulnerable.

"Don't be afraid Light..."  
>"You still have feelings for Liona…don't you?"<br>"Yes…but my feelings have always truly been for you, what happened with Liona is what happens when I'm clueless and desperate,"

That last word confused seemed to confuse her.

"You have no idea how much it hurt me when you urged me to go to the movie, I wanted you to say no and now...I don't have my first kiss anymore...I couldn't share that with you even though I really wanted it with you..."  
>"Then you can have every other number,"<p>

I looked back at her, a little surprised and she was smiling at me. I moved closer to her.

"I love you..._Claire_,"

I finally began to call her by her real name and tears poured from her eyes.

"I love you too Hope...more than you'll ever know..."

I hugged her as if she would vanish in an instant. I turned her face to mine and I finally kissed her in the way I've wanted to for the past seven years. I still couldn't believe she waited for me for such a long time. I was finally enlightened…yes, pun intended.


	14. Reality

Chapter 13- Reality

_**Hope's Perspective**_

I rose to another morning, my head killing me from stress. I woke up to see myself in my bed. What happened? I looked to my right to see Lightning, a small distance away from me in the bed. I stretched and my bones cracked, which woke her up.

"Hey…you're up early,"  
>"I don't know why,"<p>

She got up and looked at me as if I was sick.

"Are you feeling better?"  
>"What did I say last night?"<br>"Nothing at all, you just walked in and passed out on the bed,"  
>"After we dropped Liona home?"<br>"Yes, why did something happen that I don't know about?"

You've gotta be kidding me. THAT WAS ALL A DREAM? WHAT THE HELL?

"Oh…sorry, memory's a little hazy…"

She hugged me.

"I was here the entire time you were out…I'm sorry if I fell asleep on the bed with you,"  
>"No…it's alright, you were worried, I should be apologizing for worrying you,"<p>

She nodded against my shoulder. Oh how I wished my dream had happened…what I'd be able to do to ease her worries…

_**Lightning's Perspective**_

He must've thought something important happened last night…I wonder if it was because of the drinks we had before we took Liona home. Whatever the reason, he seemed as if something important happened between us last night. I let him go so he could go downstairs to get breakfast. What was going through his head?

More importantly, what's going on in my head? I wanted to tell him everything last night but he went to sleep before I could do anything. He just stormed out of the car and ignored me…well it was perfectly understandable after all; he just broke up with his girlfriend and he would likely never see her again in addition to the added stress of his father being gone from this world. Even though it was such a long time ago, I know it still affects him. Then he had to worry about medical school, in which he has to leave us again and he likely had to take the full eight years as well since he wants to be a diagnostics specialist. This made me realize just how far he came since I first met him.

I met him so long ago, when he was just fourteen and till a kid. I had to teach him how to survive and how to fight and I had to show him the hard facts of life. I helped him and his father when the military came after him for housing us. Hope even continued to have faith that we would be able to stop Orphan and save Cocoon…he was just as his name was…nothing but pure hope. It pained me to see his life in such shambles. I knew I had to help him get through this…I had to help him get his mind off of all of this. I knew what I had to do. Even if it doesn't help him completely get his mind off of this, it would at least give him the happiness he needs to overcome it on his own. I walked to my room to change my clothes.

Hope's Perspective

Maker? What the hell are you doing up there? You're throwing dreams like that into my head and it's supposed to help me? HOW IS THAT SUPPOSED TO HELP ME? WISHING THAT LIGHT WAS REALLY BY MY SIDE WAS GOING TO SOLVE THESE PROBLEMS?

I turned off the shower and dried myself off before going downstairs and starting to make a sandwich on the island. Things were really beginning to get out of hand since I moved here and Dad was gone…oh man Dad…I wish you were here to help me out. I really didn't know how I was going to be able to take on medical school with all of this on my mind. I was alone, I lost my girlfriend, my dad's no longer with me and now…I had to live with the fact that there was no way I could be with Light. She had to be mad at me for dating Liona. She kept saying that it was perfectly fine but a glint in her eyes always told me otherwise. Then again…wishful thinking's a hell of a thing; it makes you believe things that didn't really happen and also things that probably won't happen. That dream described everything I wanted to happen perfectly but I'm pretty sure if I did that in real life, she would've decked me right then and there.

"Hope?"

I turned to see Light. She looked as if she just showered. She wore blue shorts that were just a little too short for comfort and a pink tanktop, far different from her nightgown. She seemed determined.

"I want you to tell me what happened last night, you had to have dreamt something for you to be questioning what went on…"

"_Damn her for being so analytical,"_

I sighed before I placed the knife aside and stepped from around the counter and leaned against it. It was better if I had nothing between me and her in case she decided to have a rage burst; it was better than running from it.

"I…dreamt that…well,"

She folded her arms and had an unamused look on her face.

"Hope, you stormed in last night and ignored me completely, you even walked past Snow and Serah and said nothing before you passed out, you have no idea how worried we were about you and now you're pretending as if this didn't happen, spit it out,"  
>"I'M PRETENDING THAT NOTHING HAPPENED?"<p>

My fists clenched and she seemed a little shocked at my sudden outburst.

"HAVE YOU SEEN WHAT'S HAPPENED IN THE PAST YEAR AND A HALF?"

I don't know what caused me to get so angry. It was probably the mixed feelings I had for her right now. Half of me wanted nothing more than to hold her and tell her how much she means to me but the other half wanted me to let her know that I'm not in this world to ease their worries; I was in it to live.

"Hope…I…"  
>"I'm…I'm so sorry Light…"<p>

My head turned down. I really shouldn't have done that…I felt like I just threw a brick at her glass heart. To my surprise, she was in front of me in an instant. She flung her arms around my neck and embraced me, burying her head into the bottom of my neck. To think I grew a bit less than half a head taller than her during all this time.

"I know I shouldn't be so nosy and I know I shouldn't be so concerned all the time…because you're a man now,"

My eyes widened. I removed her arms but I held her hands before I took a breath.

"I dreamt…that I was with you Light…"

Her eyes widened.

"I…I've always wanted to be with you…ever since that day I asked you out…"

Her eyes became a little teary, more than likely because she remembered that day right down to the details on my face when I asked her that question. A smile formed on her face but just barely.

"Because…I've liked you long before that day Light…but that was the day that marked when I felt ready to be with you if you gave me the opportunity,"

The truth was that I've had a crush on her ever since our journey as l'Cie. I didn't want to tell her because she would've thought I was too young to be having feelings such as those.

"I dreamt that…you were there when I was down about Liona and I finally got the courage to tell you how I felt about you…and I dreamt that you responded positively…"

I turned my face away from her.

"But now that I betrayed you by dating Liona instead of you, I understand if you don't want to…"  
>"Hope?"<p>

I turned to her and she had a slightly angry look on her face.

"Shut the hell up,"

I was confused.

"Don't you dare say what I want to do,"  
>"But-"<p>

I was silenced by her finger.

"I wanted an explanation and you've given it to me, my turn to talk,"

I kept quiet.

"Hope you keep making it sound like it's a bad thing that you harbor these feelings inside of you…and it sort of is, you said it yourself: it's not good to bottle things up inside,"

My eyes narrowed.

"Thank you…"

I looked up in shock. Thank you for what?

"Thank you…for waiting for me…I know I haven't helped much in your restless thoughts with my stubborn attitude but…you just told me everything and I…"

Her voice cracked slightly and her eyes began to leak tears. She wasn't crying however.

"I'm so glad…that you told me this because…I feel the same way about you…"  
>"You…you do?"<p>

I had to be dreaming…I am dreaming again…aren't I?

"Hope, can you imagine how I felt when you asked me that question one year ago?"

I recalled the time when I practically asked her if I could go see that movie with Liona.

"Everything in my heart wanted me to tell you no…but I thought that she deserved it more than me because she had the guts to tell you the way she felt about you…I was stupid for doing that,"  
>"I was the one who should have said no,"<br>"You didn't know if I would ever feel the same way about you…it's not your fault Hope,"

She seemed to have analyzed this almost perfectly.

"Liona talked to you didn't she?"  
>"She told me everything she thought about you Hope,"<br>"What did she say?"  
>"She told me how much you spoke about me when she was around you,"<p>

I scratched the back of my head nervously; I was hoping she wouldn't reveal that.

"She also said…that you didn't truly feel for her, she said she always felt that there was a part of you that clung onto your feelings for me…"

I blushed.

"You held onto feelings you've had for almost eight years…you waited for me for nearly half your life Hope…you have no idea how special that makes me feel,"

She moved closer.

"I…I'm sorry for taking so long to tell you myself…"  
>"No Light…it's fine, what matters is that we've gotten it out of our systems,"<br>"…Not completely,"

Before I could question what she meant, she met me in a heated kiss. It was full of longing but also full of pure and genuine love. This was real, not like my dream where it seemed like a fantasy come true. This was reality. My phone went off, much to my dismay. I let her go and took it out of my pocket as I took a few steps away. The caller ID was the medical school I applied for. I answered it.

"Hello?"  
><em>"Yes, is this Hope Estheim? I'm terribly sorry for calling so early in the morning,"<br>_"Headmaster? Can I call you back in about an hour, I'm in the middle of something important,"  
><em>"Oh you are? Alright, it can wait until then, my apologies,"<em>  
>"It's perfectly fine, thank you and I'm sorry,"<br>_"It's fine my dear boy, we have much to talk about when you call though,"_  
>"I can tell, thank you sir and goodbye,"<p>

I shut the phone and threw it into the chair behind me as I walked back to her.

"Why?"  
>"You're far more important at the moment…"<p>

I continued to kiss her, lifting her into my arms and placing her on the stool. She leaned back and accepted my lips with the same heated longing as she did before. My hands shot to her waist and slowly ran up and down her exposed skin below her tanktop. Her hands were locked around my neck and she pulled me into her more. This kiss was getting more intense by the second. Our breaths quickened, our heartbeats rose and I knew that if I didn't stop soon, I was going to have a heart attack. Too much adrenaline was going through my veins but I just couldn't bear to stop; I was afraid that this would never happen again. To my dismay, she stopped kissing me. She was panting softly.

"I suppose I shouldn't call you Light anymore huh?"

Her eyes widened.

"Claire? Is it a fair statement to call us…boyfriend and girlfriend?"

She shed more tears and she smiled.

"Way more than fair,"

I kissed her once more; reveling in the fact that I have gained the one thing I've always wanted ever since I was fourteen: the love of Lightning "Claire" Farron.


	15. Renewed Hope

Chapter 14- Renewed Hope

"Did you call the headmaster?"  
>"Yeah...I got good news,"<br>"What is it?"

The Farrons and Snow stared at me with excitement.

"They accepted me,"  
>"So you're going to need help in paying it off?"<p>

I smiled at Snow's question.

"Not a cent, full scholarship,"

Their eyes widened.

"Hope that's wonderful!"  
>"Looks like I get to finally be a diagnostics specialist,"<p>

They were really happy for me, especially Light. She didn't say anything but I could see the joy radiating from her eyes.

"That however brings me to the bad news..."

They stopped cheering and listened.

"The headmaster advised that I...well, say goodbye to all of my family because they want me there full time to teach freshman classes at another college nearby,"  
>"So...you have to go there and stay there forever?"<br>"At least for two years...I can choose to continue to teach after that much time has passed,"  
>"So you have to leave and you can't visit us?"<p>

Light's eyes shone with quiet determination.

"We'll come and see you,"

I looked at her in slight disbelief.

"You do realize that's an almost 10 hour drive from here right?"  
>"I don't care, if you think you're getting rid of us, it ain't that easy buddy,"<p>

Snow smiled and so did I.

"As a matter of fact, we were looking to have a vacation soon anyways, we can be at the hotel near to the campus for it,"  
>"You mean-"<br>"We're not going anywhere buddy, you're stuck with us one way or another,"

I smiled.

"Thanks..."  
>"When are you leaving?"<br>"Next week,"  
>"Then we're packing up cause we're heading out with you,"<p>

Snow and Serah turned and left the room but not without congratulating me again. Light beckoned me to follow her and she led me to her room. I still wasn't used to being able to call her Claire but everytime she spoke to me, I'd say it. In my head, I would always refer to her as Light.

"You thought you were going to end up like Liona didn't you?"  
>"Sort of..."<br>"Did you forget everything that happened 2 days ago?"

I smiled.

"Never..."

She smiled at me.

"I'm with you wherever you decide to go,"  
>"I know...I guess I was just being a pessimist again,"<br>"You've got to stop that,"

I scratched my head nervously.

"I guess...I'm just not used to being able to...well, you know,"

She nodded at me. A blush appeared on her cheeks and I felt one creep onto mine.

"Its late, I guess I'll turn in for the night now,"  
>"You can sleep in here whenever you want to,"<br>"I know,"

She smiled again and walked away to change. I returned after doing so myself and joined her in the bed, wrapping my arms almost protectively around her stomach. I clung to her, as if she would disappear like a puff of smoke. My head buried itself in her neck.

"Are you alright?"  
>"Yeah...I'm just glad you're here,"<p>

I knew she was blushing.

"I am too..."

She turned and faced me.

"You know that you won't go through this without us around right?"  
>"I didn't think you'd be so persistent,"<br>"Do you honestly I'm going to let you go that easily?"  
>"I certainly hoped not,"<p>

She let out a sound between a scoff and and laugh.

"You and your puns..."  
>"Come on Claire, you know you love them,"<br>My hand brushed her face and she held it gently.

"Yeah...I do,"

She shifted close to me and buried her head against my neck. I drew the covers over us.

"When are we going to tell them?"  
>"Whenever you're ready to,"<p>

She paused for a brief moment.

"I'll think about it...cause Maker knows Snow's never gonna stop the teasing,"  
>"You're afraid of the teasing?"<br>"No, I'm just trying to refrain from taking out some of his teeth from annoyance,"

I laughed softly.

"Alright...take as long as you need to, I don't mind things the way they are,"  
>"That's good..."<p>

She faced me and I kissed her. She sighed into the kiss as if she were holding her breath for a while. I knew it simply meant that she felt the two sides of her clashing. One side wanted desperately to savor every moment that she had with me while the other still wanted to make herself not vulnerable to anyone or anything. That side of her probably saw this as a weakness but the other saw it as a gift from The Maker himself.

I stopped kissing her.

"Are you alright?"  
>"What would make you think I'm not?"<br>"I know you Claire..."

She seemed to have caught onto what I meant.

"I'm sorry...its just that I've been a closed book for such a long time that I'm not used to being able to share my feelings like this..."  
>"I understand...but know that I'm always here for you,"<br>"I know,"

She snuggled into my arms. She soon fell asleep, leaving me to ponder at what will happen when it's finally time to take on school again. How was I going to keep a relationship with her while staying in medical school?

I had to admit the only downside to having a realtionship with her would be the fact that I would be thinking about her probably to the point where it would distract me tremendously.

I also have to take into account her own feelings; She was already completely new to this and her first and only boyfriend was going to spend 80% of each of the 5 years I had to go there away from her. I had no idea how she would be able to bear that in her mind but I couldn't count out the fact that she's probably the strongest woman that I know; she bore the pain of me dating Liona, the death of her parents and all of the doubts she had that she would ever seen Serah again and she was still able to smile.

Maybe I was underestimating her...maybe this can work. Sleep soon took hold of me but not before I made the resolve to get through this. Not alone this time, but together with her and renewed hope that I am now and will never be alone in this life again...once again, pun intended.


	16. The Half Way Mark

Chapter 15- The Half Way Mark

"Hey buddy, just letting you know that Light wants to come visit you, hit me up when you get this message,"

I shut my phone. It was already two years into medical school and I was handling it pretty well. I was still top of my class though I had to admit I had to strain myself at times in order to do so. I hadn't seen Light since she left at the end of the three month vacation they took at the Clearwater Hotel near the campus, which would make it almost a year and a half. I wasn't able to spend time with them due to all the work I had to tackle but she wanted to visit me. There's no way I could say no to that even if it killed me. I opened the phone again and called Snow.

_"Speak on it,"  
><em>"Just got your message,"  
><em>"Hey buddy, how's it going?"<br>_"Fine thus far,"  
><em>"Awesome stuff man, alright, let me put you onto sis,"<em>

There was a short silence until I heard him call her name.

_"Hello?"  
><em>"Hi Claire,"

I knew she was overjoyed to hear me.

_"Hi Hope...how's school going? Or do I really need to ask?"  
><em>"I feel like Dr. House already,"

She laughed.

"Snow told me you wanted to visit?"  
><em>"Yeah...I wanted to come tomorrow,"<br>_"Why tomorrow?"  
><em>"Don't you know what day it is the day after?"<br>_"Of course I do,"

I could sense the blush that creeped on her face. She must've felt like an idiot for asking me that question.

_"It's my birthday Hope,"  
><em>"Yeah but don't you think its better to spend it with Serah and Snow?"  
><em>"I had a dinner with them already...they also want me to go see you,"<br>_"Oh...well how long do you plan to stay?"  
><em>"A week,"<br>_"That's a long time Light, what happened to your job?"  
><em>"I lost it,"<br>_"Why?"  
><em>"Because the pharmacy closed last week, there's no longer a need for me to be there to guard it,"<em>

I couldn't believe she lost her job. She got it about a week after she got back from her vacation and the pharmacy closed down already?

"What happened?"  
><em>"The owner retired, she's 65 now and she closed it down because she sold it to Eden Pharmaceuticals, they have much more than adequate guards and quite frankly, it was a boring job...paid good but still boring,"<em>

I laughed; it was probably because she was such a good fighter and soldier why it was so boring. I'm pretty sure whoever was stupid enough to set a foot in there to steal anything met her fist or worse.

_"I'm using some of the pay I earned to come visit you...well, if it's alright with you..."  
><em>"Of course it's alright with me!"

I could sense the smile she had on her face when I said that.

"You can take less money, you can stay with me on campus,"  
><em>"But...isn't that-"<br>_"The Headmaster won't mind a week of you being around, he loves me like a son,"  
><em>"Oh...well, I'll see you tomorrow?"<br>_"Yeah...I can't wait..."  
><em>"Alright...I'm going to pack,"<br>_"I love you Claire..."

She paused for a moment and I could almost feel the happiness running through her.

_"I love you too Hope..."_

I shut the phone and immediately called the Headmaster.

_"Hope my dear boy, how can I help you today?"  
><em>"Hello Headmaster...I just wanted to ask a favor,"  
><em>"Anything my dear boy,"<br>_"Well...a good friend of mine who I haven't seen in a long time..."  
><em>"Say no more, she can stay,"<br>_"But...how did you-"  
><em>"I was once your age son, I know all the tricks in the book, I understand it completely,"<br>_"So you know it's my-"  
><em>"Well aware, it's perfectly fine for her to stay as long as she wishes to so long as it doesn't change the way you do your work,"<br>_"Thank you sir,"  
><em>"Call me Cid,"<br>_"Thank you...Cid,"  
><em>"Haha my boy, you've made me proud to accept you into this school and I know you'll do great,"<br>_"You're too kind, thanks again Cid,"  
><em>"Anytime my dear boy,"<em>

I shut the phone and continued with my day, anxious to see Light tomorrow.


	17. Suprises

Chapter 16- Surprises

"No Hope, I have it,"

I ignored her words as I took her bags from her and placed them in my room. She seemed unamused, more than likely because she didn't see the whole gentleman routine of carrying a woman's bags for her. I turned to her.

"Well, it's not the hotel but here's home sweet home!"

She smiled at me.

"That's a rather small bed you have there,"  
>"Which is why I'm sleeping on this,"<p>

I pulled out an inflatable twin sized mattress out of my closet. She shook her head and laughed.

"You should know that I don't mind sharing,"  
>"I know you don't, but do you really want to share that tiny thing for the next week?"<p>

She paused for a brief moment.

"I don't mind..."

Stubborn as always. I put the mattress away.

"We'll give it a shot for a night I guess, anyways, I have class in ten minutes so I'll be back in an hour,"

She nodded and I picked up my bag. I turned to her and hugged her.

"Thanks for coming Claire...it really means a lot to me,"

She pushed me away slightly and kissed me.

"I wish you didn't have class..."  
>"Why? What did you have in mind?"<p>

She looked down and blushed.

"I wanted to...catch up,"  
>"Catch up huh?"<p>

She blushed again and playfully smacked my shoulder.

"There's plenty of time for that after class, give me an hour?"

She reluctantly nodded and I kissed her deeply. She seemed intoxicated when I stopped.

"There's plenty more where than came from,"

She scoffed and turned away with her arms folded. She knew she enjoyed it but she was still to stubborn to admit her weakness. I ran towards class, arriving just as the professor walked in. I took my usual seat, in the corner of the furthest row. I sometimes wondered to myself how I could learn in these conditions: 65 students listening to a professor in the middle of the auditorium lecturing.

"Hey Hope, I noticed you have someone visiting you,"

I turned around to see one of those bully figures, Bruno Markhor. He was lately pestering me about my personal life and there would be days where I had to avoid him because I didn't want to start a conflict. He wasn't the most intimidating of men but he was definitely bigger than I was. I didn't know how to fight very well apart from what Light taught me all these years and also from the ever occassional sparring Snow and I would have.

"I saw her, really grown woman,"  
>"It's none of your business, leave it alone,"<br>"Oh? Getting defensive are you?"

I ignored him, turning my attention to my notebook.

"She your big sister or something?"

I continued to ignore him but I could feel annoyance and rage build within me. Thankfully, time passed quickly and I left the room. He however followed me.

"Who is she I wonder? Cause I'd love to shag her,"

That was the last straw; no one gets away with talking about her like that. I turned around.

"Listen you sick excuse for a human being, go find something else to do than but into things that don't concern you, when I told you it's not your business, I meant it,"  
>"Oh? I hit a bullseye there? She's gotta be your girlfriend then,"<p>

The guys following him began to laugh at me.

"You wish you were dating that hot girl, no way you are Estheim,"  
>"Says the idiot who can't keep a girl in his bed longer than the duration of a hangover,"<br>"Why you little..."

He grabbed me and slammed me against the locker. It didn't hurt at all but his nails were digging into my skin. I looked him in the eyes and he punched me in the gut. I cringed and fell to my knees.

"That'll teach ya punk, learn your place here squirt,"  
>"And what place would that be?"<p>

A sight for sore eyes and music to my ears, Headmaster Cid came walking this way.

"Is there a problem here gentlemen?"

He looked at me and shook his head.

"Mr. Markhor, I do hope you realize the degree of trouble you're in?"  
>"Headmaster..."<p>

He turned and apologized before he left with his posse. I rose to my feet.

"Terribly sorry my boy, I didn't expect for them to get physical,"  
>"Don't worry about it, I'm fine,"<br>"So has your visitor arrived?"  
>"Yes sir...she's-"<br>"Would you mind terribly about an introduction? I'm interested in meeting this woman,"

I wasn't going to say no; Headmaster Cid was a good man.

"Sure, right this way sir,"  
>"Didn't I say you could call me Cid?"<br>"I respect you far too much to address you so casually sir,"  
>"Then perhaps we should spend more time together then?"<br>"That would be good sir,"

We arrived at my room and I found Light, sleeping in my bed. She didn't bother to draw the sheets down but she wore a tanktop that didn't cover her bellybutton. She also wore a pair of shorts that were just a tad too short for any other man to lay their eyes on without getting a punch to the face.

"I'm sorry sir, I'll wake her up if you could wait outside for a second?"  
>"Sure,"<p>

He stepped out. I put my bag down and crawled toward her, leaning my head down towards her cheek. I gently kissed her cheek and she slowly stirred as I continued to place more kisses. I eventually made my way to her lips when she turned back to face me and she woke up fully.

"Are you tired?"  
>"Just a little..."<br>"Can you put on a pair of pants really quick? My headmaster wants to meet you,"

She nodded and slipped on one of my track pants and stepped outside with me.

"Ahh! Mr. Estheim's better half! Such a pleasure to finally meet you miss?"  
>"Lightning Farron, you can just call me Light,"<p>

She shook his hand and he bowed before kissing her hand. She smiled at his courtesy.

"Pleasure to meet you too headmaster,"  
>"Oh call me Cid, friends of Mr. Estheim are friends of mine as well,"<br>"Alright Cid,"

I wondered how she could adopt such an informal name so quickly. I shrugged off the thought.

"So you're going to be spending some time here?"  
>"Well...yes sir,"<br>"Oh no need to be nervous my dear, you can stay as long as you'd like, I just hope that Mr. Estheim here will keep up his work,"  
>"Y-Y-Yes sir,"<br>"Splendid! I had wanted to meet you for so long Miss Farron, Mr. Estheim never let's me forget your presence in his life and I must say, you are a very beautiful woman,"

Light blushed and smiled at him.

"You're too kind,"

He turned to me.

"So are you going to invite us into your abode Mr. Estheim,"  
>"Sure, come on in,"<p>

I let him enter but Light pulled me aside for a moment.

"Is there a reason you two are on such good terms?"  
>"He's a good man, he's been watching out for me since I got here, trust me when I say he's cool,"<p>

She sighed.

"I wanted some..."  
>"I know, he won't stay for long and I can't tell him no after all he's done for me,"<p>

She nodded and entered the room and I followed suit.

_One hour later_

"So Cid, enough about us, tell us how you got started in the field of medicine,"  
>"Ahh well it all started during high school when I took my first Biology class,"<p>

We warmed up to him quite well and we truly didn't mind his company at all. Light was actually very interested in his stories.

"I ended up doing an experiment in which I was able to correct the teacher in terms of the methods of execution,"

We nodded almost in unison.

"After that day, I decided to devote my life to Biology and the sciences, so much that I graduated with the highest grades in science the school had ever recorded,"  
>"Which school was that?"<br>"Oerba High School, I'm from Gran Pulse,"  
>"Did you know someone named Oerba Yun Fang?"<br>"Knew her? I was best friends with her,"

My eyes opened wide and Light nearly fell out of her seat.

"How about Vanille?"  
>"Ahh Vanille, such a free spirited one, where is she these days?"<p>

I opened my mouth to answer but Light's eyes told me to keep it a secret.

"We met them some time ago, haven't seen them in years,"  
>"Oh that's too bad, I would've loved to catch up,"<br>"So how did you go about becoming headmaster at such a young age?"  
>"I suppose it would be due to the fact that I graduated from here in three years instead of five,"<p>

_"He graduated 2 years early? How smart is this guy?"_

"I decided to stay because I loved teaching others and when I was 32, I became headmaster,"  
>"If I may ask sir, how old are you now?"<br>"36,"

Young indeed.

"Well I believe I've overstayed my welcome, time for me to take my leave,"

He turned to me.

"I'll see you on Monday,"  
>"Thanks for coming and you're welcome here anytime,"<br>"Thank you, Miss Farron? Good day,"

Light nodded and he left the room. My phone suddenly went off.

"Hello?"

_"Hi Hope!"_

I couldn't believe who I was hearing.

"Vanille?"


	18. Birthday Morning

Chapter 17- Birthday Morning

"Hope...you didn't have to do that you know..."  
>"I wanted to,"<p>

She seemed upset when I brought her a lap tray full of breakfast food from our cafeteria. She seemed happy when she saw that I drew the words "Happy Birthday Claire" on her pancake in icing.

"You're niceness is annoying,"  
>"You know you love it,"<p>

She shook her head and proceeded to dig in. She seemed impressed with the food quality.

"Is the food always this good?"  
>"Weekends are better but yeah, just about the same,"<p>

She smiled and I took the plate from her when she was finished. She went to take a shower and I decided to wrap up the homework I didn't finish yesterday. Fifteen minutes later, I felt her hands on my shoulders and her head rested on my right.

"What're you up to?"  
>"Finishing this last assignment,"<br>"This looks complicated,"  
>"Not really, this is the easy stuff, wait till you see the hard stuff,"<p>

She shook her head and I finished the final problem before spinning around in my chair.

"Done,"

She sat and on the bed. I knew she was teasing me in her own unique way. She wasn't the seductive type of lover; she was more of the type that dares you to make the first move. I knew she wanted me around her but she just didn't want to seem desperate; it just wasn't her.

I rose to my feet and crawled toward her. She didn't move and before I reached her, I spun on my hands and sat beside her. She pouted and I could sense the frustration inside of her.

"Damn you..."  
>"Gotcha,"<p>

She surprised me when she straddled me; she never usually made the first move like this. My head and back were pressed against the wall as she very slowly ran her fingers up my arm. The feel was _**agonizingly**_ pleasant. Her eyes didn't leave mine for a moment. She leaned forward, her eyes narrowing. I felt bad for teasing her now; she only wanted to be with me and she still wasn't used to being in a relationship despite ours being three years strong. During those three years, we hardly ever got to spend anytime together thanks to my teaching job and also due to my classes.

I embraced her and kissed her. Her arms wrapped around my neck and pulled me close, fitting us together like a puzzle. It was a long time since we last got a moment like this to ourselves. My hand unconsciously reached for her shirt sleeve and tugged. She took the hint and raised her arms, allowing me to remove it. I stared at the form fitting pink tanktop before she did the same gesture. I was shirtless seconds later.

"You've been going to the gym haven't you?"  
>"A bit,"<p>

Her hands ghosted over ab muscles and she sent shivers down my spine when she breathed out what sounded like her own form of awe.

"Impressed? I'm still scrawny if you ask me,"  
>"I didn't ask,"<p>

I laughed and she smiled at me again before reconnecting our lips. I just couldn't get enough of her taste. It wasn't long before my hands ghosted over her tanktop. Within seconds, it too met the ever growing pile of clothes beside my bed. She wore a black lacy bra with pink poka dots.

_"Holy crap...this woman is going to be the death of me,"_

She removed her shorts, revealing the other half of the two piece set and I nearly dropped unconscious. The room felt 60 degrees hotter and nothing else existed but the sapphire orbs locked with mine and the smoking hot body hosting them with the only face I would ever truly love. She pulled me down, laying herself out and crashing our lips together again.

The heat from her body felt outright fantastic in the cold AC filled room and my hands eagerly explored the newly exposed skin of her legs. I can honestly say that I don't know of anything in this world that felt as good Lightning Farron's skin. My hands traveling all over her legs caused her to shiver and softly moan. I stopped kissing her and moved to her neck before I grabbed one of her legs and awkwardly wrapped it around my waist, feeling the softness of her upper thighs. She crushed me against her body, silently urging me to continue my work on her neck and her legs began to tremble. It must've felt amazing once I heard a particularly soft moan escape from her lips. That moan wasn't like the others. This one...sounded _**enticing**_. Unwanted heat and pressure began to build in my abdomen area and I cursed myself.

I had to stop; if I continued I knew that I'd lose self control. I wanted her with all my heart and I had no doubt that she wouldn't object to my advances. I reluctantly moved away from her, panting softly. She had a concerned look on her face, as if she felt she did something wrong.

"Is something wrong?"  
>"I...don't want to go any further..."<br>"Why not?"

She really didn't seem to mind it. In fact, it looked like she outright planned for us to continue; does a woman like her always wear something so enticing over her usual everyday wear that only seemed to reveal her stomach? As tempting as she was, I didn't want to take that step so selfishly, especially on just the second day after having not seen her for two years.

"I...I just can't...I mean there's not a thing wrong with you...if anything,"

I swallowed some air and my head collapsed beside hers onto the pillow.

"You're..._**too tempting**_,"

She blushed and breathed out a long drawn out breath. She again crushed her body against mine.

"I'm sorry...I should've considered what would've went through your head,"  
>"It's alright Claire; you can't help it if you're <em><strong>irresistible<strong>_,"

She again blushed.

"Just know Hope..."

She pushed me against the wall gently and almost seductively moved as far forward as my body would allow. Even more pressure and heat built up within me and I was sure that I would lose control if this lasted any longer.

"That whenever you're ready...I am too,"

I couldn't believe my ears; did she really just say that she's ready to take the next step? I urged her to allow me to get up, desperate to splash cold water on my overheating face and to have a well needed shower; I had to get away from her.

"Can I join you?"  
><em>"Is this the same Light?"<em>

My eyes widened and I decided to humor the request and nodded. She laughed.

"Just kidding,"

I breathed out a sigh of both frustration and of relief; she was teasing me but if she really did join me in the shower, I would've definitely lost control of myself. After a prolonged shower, I put on a jacket.

"Where are you going?"  
>"We're going out; it is your birthday today after all,"<p>

She sighed and got dressed. I sighed as well; as teasing as it was, she looked _**gorgeous**_ in that ivory two piece. I made a mental note to myself as to just how she looked with that on.She clothed herself appropriately although she exposed her stomach a little too much for my liking. I quickly sent a text to Vanille, asking her and Fang to meet me at where I intended to take her.

"Where are we going?"  
>"It's a surprise,"<p>

We headed for the car. Hopefully, things would turn out great. Sheesh...what's up with all these puns that I intend?


	19. To Save A Friend

Chapter 19- To Save A Friend

I parked my car just outside the park near campus and Light followed me. Following the directions on my phone, I arrived at a small clearing near an edge of the park. There was a small stream and even a pond here along with a few benches and such.

"What're we doing here?"  
>"Meeting a couple people here,"<br>"So far away from the entrance?"

I shrugged.

"It's where they said to go according to the text message,"  
><em>"All these years and she's still such a downer, you two haven't changed,"<em>

Light seemed absolutely shocked to hear that familiar tone and she turned to see Fang jump down from a tree.

_"Hi Lightning! Hi Hope!"_

Vanille came from behind a tree and I smiled to myself. She ran up to Light and hugged her while Fang casually walked up to her and nodded her head. To my surprise, Light hugged her too and Fang chuckled before returning the gesture.

"Happy birthday Light!"  
>"Yeah, what she said,"<p>

Light nodded and hugged them both.

"Thank you,"

She turned to me and smiled.

"So this was your surprise?"  
>"Yeah...that and we're having a picnic,"<br>"With what?"

Vanille skipped over to the tree and pulled out a basket. Light shook her head and laughed to herself. We all sat down and began to dig in.

"Holy...who made this?"  
>"That would be me,"<p>

Fang smiled.

"If you could cook like this, why did you send me out to pick fruit when we were in Gran Pulse?"  
>"Cause I liked picking on you,"<p>

I sighed and everyone laughed at me. Fang rubbed my head, probably a sign of her own form of affection.

"Hey, no waterworks now,"  
>"I'm 23 years old. I don't cry anymore, I laugh instead,"<p>

Fang's eyes widened, almost as if she just realized how much I've grown over the years. It was nearly ten years we hadn't seen each other.

"Yeah you got that right; you're twice the kid I knew back then,"  
>"Yeah Hope, at first I didn't recognize you which was why we didn't pop out sooner,"<p>

They must've recognized Light because she didn't really change much in terms of appearance. She was as beautiful as ever even at the age of 30.

"Sorry, guess I couldn't really control my growth spurt,"  
>"You're looking good Hope,"<p>

I knew Vanille was just being Vanille. She was such a free-spirited person and before I knew it, she was hugging me. Fang smiled.

"I agree, you've really grown up kid,"

Light smiled at me.

_"Should we tell them?"  
><em>_"If you really want to, I don't mind,"_

I don't know how we did it sometimes but we were able to non-verbally communicate with each other. I nodded before we scooted close to each other. Fang raised an eyebrow and Vanille covered her mouth with a hand.

"I forgot to tell you two..."

Light put her hand on mine and blushed before she looked away.

"We're dating,"

Fang's face was priceless and Vanille didn't stop cheering for even a moment.

"Congratulations!"

Fang smiled but it seemed as if it were both genuine and hollow, as if she was dreading to hear that.

_Two hours later..._

"Hey, what're you doing here by yourself?"

I turned around to see Fang leaning against a tree.

"Thinking,"  
>"Mind if I join you?"<p>

I scooted over and pat the space beside me. She sat down.

"Where's Light and Vanille?"  
>"They're catching up, I decided to leave when Vanille started asking about Snow and Serah,"<br>"I take it you didn't want to hear about them?"  
>"Serah I don't mind, big lumux boy on the other hand is kinda boring,"<p>

I chuckled.

"So, Dr. Estheim huh?"  
>"That's what I'm hoping for,"<br>"You'll be fine kid, you've got a good head on your shoulders,"  
>"Thanks,"<p>

She nodded and rubbed my head.

"Can't believe we were in stasis for so long,"  
>"Weren't you in there for 500 years before?"<br>"That's not what I meant, I'm talking about how much things have changed,"

Fang's face softened and she looked down.

"I never expected you to be dating Light at all, if anything I thought you two would've gone your seperate ways after the whole crystal thing,"  
>"She's changed a lot over the years, I probably know that better than anyone else,"<br>"Yeah I see what you mean,"

She sighed.

"Something's been on your mind all day, what is it?"

Fang looked at me, slightly shocked and I could've sworn I actually saw some fear in her eyes.

"Oh...personal stuff,"  
>"Want to talk about it?"<p>

Fang swallowed some air.

"Well..let's just say that I haven't had the best luck with men,"  
>"You? You have bad luck with men?"<p>

_"She's messing with me...right?"_

"Yeah...hard to believe isn't it?"  
>"Why do you think you do?"<p>

I turned to face her. She really was a bad person at all. In fact, as much as it left a bad taste in my mouth to think this, Fang was _**gorgeous**_. If she thought she was lacking in the physical department then she was just plain stupid. In terms of her personality, yes she was a little flirtatious and such but I personally don't think it was be a problem to a guy who knows her well: if Fang really cares for you, she'd tear down the sky to make you happy.

"Well...first thing is that I've only ever liked one person, someone from high school but he ended up becoming something I didn't want to be around,"  
>"And what was that?"<br>"A l'Cie,"

_"That...sucks..."_

"He was the first person I saw go Cie'th and from that point, I tried not to like anyone because it seemed that whoever I liked, bad things would happen to them,"  
>"What's preventing you now? The fal'Cie war is over,"<br>"Because the person I like now I really can't be with; it just wouldn't be right,"  
>"Why not?"<p>

Fang's eyes didn't leave mine.

"Come on kid, are you that stupid?"  
>"I seriously have no idea Fang; I don't know you like a book,"<p>

She sighed and looked around. I assumed she was trying to ensure that there was no one within earshot; she must've felt very embarrassed.

"Alright...I've never been the best with words for things this serious so I'm going to show you instead,"  
>"Ok?"<p>

I really wondered how she was going to show me the guy she liked.

_"Was he even around here? Maybe...just maybe it was...Headmaster Cid? No...she could've easily told me that...that must mean..."_

Before I could even think another word, Fang _**kissed**_ my lips for a brief moment.

"There, you happy?"

I was 100% speechless. I couldn't believe that just happened.

"W-W-Why me?"  
>"Face it kid, I've always seen you as the kind of guy I'd wanna be with when you grow up,"<br>"You mean?"  
>"Yeah, I was hoping that I would've been around instead of crystal stasis...cause then maybe...just maybe, I'd have told you when you came of age cause it isn't exactly right for a 500 year old woman being with a kid,"<p>

_"She had a point there,"_

"That still doesn't answer my question,"  
>"Look at yourself and tell me what's not to like,"<p>

I tried. Completely unbiased, I couldn't think of anything that would turn off Fang apart from a few things.

"I'm nerdy?"  
>"A man with a head on his shoulders is good, a man with a <strong>smart <strong>head on his shoulders is even better,"  
>"I'm weak,"<br>"The way you look says otherwise,"  
>"I'm with Light,"<p>

She paused and sighed.

"Yeah, that's the only problem really,"  
>"I'm sorry Fang...but I've liked Light since I was a kid,"<br>"I know; I saw the way you looked at her,"

My head drooped.

"Well guess that's it for me then,"  
>"What?"<p>

Fang rose to her feet and stood by the edge of the clearing.

"Apart from seeing Vanille again, you were the only reason why I wanted to come out of crystal stasis,"  
>"What're you doing?"<br>"Doesn't really matter if I'm around or not,"

She was about to step off but I grabbed her arm and pulled her down by jumping backwards. She landed right on top of me.

"What's the matter with you?"  
>"You obviously have no idea how it feels to be in love with someone and you know you'll never be with them..."<p>

Oerba Yun Fang was in love...with me?

"Fang...suicide is not the answer..."  
>"You have a better idea?"<p>

_"I should...set her up,"_

"Fang, if you can give me time to find someone that you could possibly like..."  
>"I can't...I can't promise you I won't do the deed during that time,"<br>"Then I'll give you hope,"

She must've thought it was a pun when she awkwardly smiled.

"Fang...I'll do whatever it takes..."

I knew what I had to end up doing to keep her away from killing herself. It would absolutely kill me inside but if she died, we all would be devastated...especially Vanille. I wouldn't be surprised if Vanille followed suit after her.

I had to convince Fang that I at least had feelings for her; that would hopefully satiate her and give me the time I need to talk to Headmaster Cid. I reluctantly forced myself to kiss her. Light would never forgive me if she saw me doing this. I had to keep it a secret; I had to give Fang the hope I gave her...for once...pun not intended. Or maybe telling her would be better...whatever it was going to be, it was for Fang's life.


	20. The End Of The Week

Chapter 20- The End Of The Week

"Oh...Hope...that feels so _**good**_..."  
>"Glad you're enjoying it, now just move a little to your right,"<br>"Why?"  
>"Because I'm trying to get every part of it,"<br>"Oh...ok,"  
>"It's how I was taught,"<br>"Where did you learn to do this? Because you're _**really**_ good at this..."  
>"Believe it or not, I watched this on TV and learnt from that,"<br>"You really mastered this from watc-...oh my god...to the left,"

I chuckled and did as she asked.

"You sure know how to make a woman feel good..."  
>"You're welcome,"<p>

She sat up and rehooked her bra. I smiled at her and kissed her forehead.

"If you need one again just ask,"  
>"I will...maybe sooner than you think,"<p>

I chuckled again.

"I never would've thought you'd do it this well considering this was the first time you've ever done it,"  
>"Neither did I; glad you enjoyed it though,"<p>

She beckoned me to come to her and I lay my head on her lap. She began to massage my temples.

"Wow...Light,"  
>"You like that?"<br>"You're returning the favor quite well,"  
>"Does it help take a load off?"<br>"Something tells me that what I did took much more of a load off,"  
>"Shiatsu massages do that,"<p>

She laughed softly.

"You looked really cute when I asked you to unhook that,"

I pointed to that polka dotted set that covered her skin.

"Well...at first I thought you were..."  
>"Being perverted?"<p>

She slowly nodded.

"Don't worry Claire, I'd never do that to you...I respect you far too much to even crack at that,"  
>"I'm not saying I'd dislike it..."<p>

I raised an eyebrow.

"I didn't want to offend you and now you're saying you don't mind it?"  
>"Hope...I'm still new to this relationship stuff but I know that I love you...as long as you're not trying to take advantage of me,"<br>"You know I'd never do that..."

She leaned over and kissed me again. I felt hollow on the inside after doing what I'm doing. It wasn't long before she had to go back home. Then...I had to go and see Fang in the park.

"You've been quiet since we got back from the park with Fang and Vanille...is everything alright?"  
>"Why wouldn't they be?"<br>"I don't know...it's like something went down and you don't want to tell me..."  
>"Claire..."<br>"Hope, you can tell me anything...I'll understand..."

I took a breath.

_"You say this now...I want to tell you everything so you can understand...but I'm afraid if I do...you'll never forgive me,"_

"Claire, Fang is in love with me,"  
>"W-What?"<br>"She told me that when we left you and Vanille alone,"  
>"Oh...so what happened?"<br>"She tried to kill herself because you and I pretty much meant there's no chance that she and I could ever be,"  
>"That's not like her...she isn't usually so weak,"<br>"Love can change even the strongest person...you're an example of that,"  
>"Touche..."<p>

Light seemed to be in thought for a few moments.

"She...kissed me before she tried to jump off the clearing...I did the only thing I could think of to keep her from doing it again..."  
>"You kissed her again?"<p>

I nodded slowly. She seemed distraught.

"So what're you going to do?"  
>"I'm going to try and get her and headmaster Cid to go out and if it works, she can be happy,"<br>"That's a good idea...but what happens until he gets back from his trip?"

She had a point; he called us yesterday saying that he had to go on a trip to Gran Pulse for an expedition. He would be back in three weeks; maybe less if it's fast.

"I...I don't know...she's unstable to the point where she may just get out of Vanille's sight and take her own life,"  
>"Hope...were it any other situation I'd seriously deck you right here and walk out the door,"<p>

My eyes began to water.

"But I know you don't truly love her...you've shown me that...you just want her to be happy and you feel responsible for her,"  
>"Claire..."<br>"Call Fang now and follow my lead,"

I did as she asked. Vanille answered the phone.

_"Hi Hope!"  
><em>"Hi Vanille, is Fang around?"  
><em>"Sure hang on,"<em>

She walked to her and the phone shuffled.

_"Hello?"  
><em>"Fang...it's Hope,"  
><em>"Oh...hi,"<em>

Light silently urged me to put the phone on speaker and told me to walk away from the phone.

"Oh someone's at the door, can you give me a second?"  
><em>"Sure go ahead,"<em>

I followed her instructions and opened the door before closing it.

"Hope...I'm not going to be able to see you...I'm sorry but we have to be apart,"

I knew she was faking but those words leaving her mouth absolutely destroyed me.

"But-"  
>"No buts...you're going to do great without me..."<p>

She walked up to the door.

"Goodbye Hope..."

She opened it and slammed it. Fang audibly gasped.

_"What happened?"_

I had to make up something.

"She had a very bad dream and we fought about it..."  
><em>"Enough to make you two break up?"<br>_"Unfortunately yes,"  
><em>"I'm sorry Hope..."<em>

Light silently urged me to coax her into thinking I needed her.

_"Hope...is it alright if I visited?"  
><em>"Yeah...I'd appreciate that..."  
><em>"I'll be there in an hour,"<em>

She hung up.

"You're willing to-"  
>"Hope, we'd all be devastated if Fang killed herself...make her happy until the headmaster gets back but until then <em>we're over<em>,"

I knew she was faking it. She wanted me to make Fang happy and I still couldn't believe she was willing to let me do this.

"Claire...I can't...I don't love her like I do you,"  
>"I know you don't...but if you don't give her the hope she needs, we'll all suffer for it, this'll just be for a month...I'll come right back, I promise..."<p>

I took a deep breath and sighed. She sat in my lap facing me.

"You're my Hope and I won't ever leave you...the life of our friend is at stake and you're the only one who can save her..."  
>"You better make this up to me,"<p>

To my surprise, she winked.

"I promise I will...every second of it,"

She kissed me deeply and it was as if all of the sorrow and sadness within me vaporized. I kissed her back with desperation in my heart. It felt like she was going to disappear like a puff of smoke and I clung to her. I began to lean her onto the bed and my kisses became more intense. She moaned and I continued, desperate to erase even the slightest thought that I didn't love her as much as I say I did. I moved from lips to neck and I even dared to go near to her chest as my hands explored every single milimeter of her exposed skin. Her moans became more intense and her body shivered in reaction to my touch and my affection. I wasn't going to see her for a month or longer and I had to get my fill of her.

"Hope...ahh..."

Each and every moan that left her mouth enticed me more. My control was steadily ebbing away. It wasn't before she stopped me from going further did I regain my senses.

"Fang's going to be here in an hour...I have to leave before then,"

I sighed and my head landed on her chest.

"I'm sorry..."  
>"I mean it; you have to make this up to me,"<p>

She smiled and kissed me one last time.

"I promise I will,"

She quickly changed and packed her bags. I drove her to the shuttle to Bodhum and saw her off, almost tearfully. I returned to campus with half an hour to spare. I awaited Fang's arrival and I hoped that I would be able to pull this off. No, no pun intended this time. This was now a matter of life and death.


	21. The Breaking Point

Chapter 21- The Breaking Point

"I didn't know there was such a great restaurant around here,"  
>"You'd be surprised at what happens when you walk around,"<br>"Yeah no kidding,"

We had just gotten back from another "date". I took her to a seafood restaurant about twenty minutes out from campus and she enjoyed it thoroughly. I couldn't believe three weeks had already passed since I decided to prevent Fang from doing something terrible to herself. I had to admit, she was a very fun person to be around in a different way than Light. Fang was the hyperactive type. Instead of sitting quietly and paying no attention to anything but what was in front of her like Light, she was more of the type to get involved with everything. She made friends with one of the waiters really quickly, something I knew Light wouldn't do without some form of reason to. Fang was also very affectionate in her own way. Light wasn't very big on public displays of affection apart from holding hands or something but Fang made it plain and obvious that I was hers. She would grab my hand and lean her head on my shoulder as we walked and she would look so engrossed with me...not that I really minded; it was making her happy and preventing the worst.

Up to now she had been staying with me everyday and she left Vanille to go to Bodhum. She ended up being able to stay with Serah after their reunion. I however had to stay away from Light; I couldn't break the illusion that we weren't together. It pained me to not be able to be with her and I knew she felt just as much, if not more pain than I did. She had to be; I was practically cheating on her.

"Hope?"  
>"Yeah?"<br>"Is everything alright? You zoned out for a moment,"  
>"Oh yeah everything's fine,"<p>

Terrible lie but she bought it.

"I'm going to introduce you to the guy tomorrow,"  
>"Oh so you found the guy?"<br>"Yeah I'm pretty sure he'll do the job,"  
>"Thank you Hope...for everything,"<br>"I'm happy I could help you Fang; it's what friends are for,"

I lay down in my bed and she joined me after changing into what she appeared to be sleeping in. She usually slept in a nightgown that wasn't revealing in any respect but tonight, she wore a black two piece.

_"Ahh crap...Maker give me the strength to remain at least somewhat faithful to her..."_

I was nervous; despite loving Light, Fang looked _**enticing**_. Her body was maddeningly sexy and her scent...I sure picked a hard job. Being a doctor couldn't be half as hard as remaining in control of my ever raging hormones. I swallowed hard when Fang got into the bed with me.

_"Time to take out the mattress,"_

I had to...there was a very strong chance that I'd give into my hormones and take her right there and the worst thing of it all...is that she'd let me. She'd give me complete access to that incredible body of hers and not have even a trace of a second thought behind it. I rose to my feet and took out the mattress.

"Hope?"  
>"Yeah?"<br>"Is there something wrong? If you're uncomfortable I'm perfectly fine with changing back,"  
>"It's alright; you want to wear that and who am I to tell you what to wear?"<br>"I...wore it for you..."  
>"For...me?"<br>"Hope...I know that we aren't really dating in the true sense of the word..."

I listened to her.

"You've been treating me with love and care because you really care about me and I appreciate that...really I do..."

I swallowed some air again.

"But my feelings for you aren't going to vanish that easily...if this guy can get my mind off of you then he really is worth the entire wait,"  
>"I'm sure he is,"<p>

She nodded.

"Hope...this is probably going to be a lot to ask of you...but I really want...you to..."

_"Shit..."_

My hormones pulverized my mind, practically ordering me to give in. I froze and I couldn't move, not even react. Fang soon walked up to see if I was alright. My body went on autopilot and within the next three seconds, I had her pressed against my bed; my hands pinned hers and my body prevented her from getting on her feet. I was panting, trying desperately to get control of myself but my hormones refused to let my good will in. My hair covered my eyes and my mouth was above hers.

Her face was surprised but I could tell that she was practically intoxicated with oxytocin. Her face was red with blush, her heart sounded like it was going to leap through her chest cavity and her eyes reflected my image with the purest fusion of lust and love. What was wrong with me? Was this carnal beast always inside of me? I should never have agreed to this but my mind wasn't even entertaining that fact.

"Fang..."  
>"Yes?"<br>"You have no idea how _**sexy**_ you look right now...did you plan this?"  
>"No...not at all...I expected you to say no because I still thought you had feelings for Light..."<p>

My eyes revealed themselves and she must've seen the sheer carnal desire within them as her face softened and she moved up more on the bed, allowing me to kneel over her instead of standing. Before I knew it, I was hungrily locking lips with her and my hands explored every part of her damn near perfect body. She moaned which only caused my desire to increase. We somehow ended up in front of the wall and she was in my lap, pushing me into it as she began to battle back with equal desire.

She was a lot more physical than Light; her hands kept trying to find a place to rest themselves somewhere on my upper body and she grinded her hips into me.

_"Maker...she's KILLING ME!"_

I didn't just desire her anymore. I was 100% convinced that I **NEEDED **this. My body and mind where caught in a chaotic rush of lust and hormones as my hands even dared to grope her rear and make their way to her breasts. I knew I was going too far but it was like that night with Liona all those years ago; I just plain didn't care at the moment. She moaned into our lip lock and I stopped kissing her only to plant my lips onto her collarbone. My guess that it was her weak spot was correct as she practically melted in my arms and her moans became **intense**.

She soon pressed me back into the wall and her mouth traveled at an agonizingly slow pace from mine to my neck.

_"She's __**REALLY **__good at this...holy crap..."_

"Fang...oh man..."

She smiled and ran her body up mine. My skin was on fire and my insides felt like they were melting with red hot lust. She soon removed my shirt and looked at my torso.

"Yeah...you've definitely grown up,"

Her hands glided over my torso, exploring the relatively toned muscles but treating them as if they were the finest piece of art she had ever had the privilege of beholding. This act was driving me _**CRAZY**_.

She smirked and resumed her previous assault on my lips. My good will and the side that cared so deeply about Lightning Farron completely vanished and all that mattered to me now was getting as much of the sexy vixen that was sitting and moaning my name in my arms I retook control and went for her collarbone once more. I smiled and looked at her intoxicated face as I returned to her lips and my hands glided up her thighs. She moaned even more intensely. My mouth recklessly moved towards the black fabric shielding her breasts. I was about to unhook it before I paused.

_"I love you too Hope..."_

Memories began to rush into my head. My carnal side tried to shake it off but it was no use; it was getting through. I was taking back control and once I regained it, the guilt and remorse hit me like a train going at full throttle.

_"I just betrayed Light..."_


	22. Revelations

Chapter 22- Revelations

I released Fang and collapsed to my bed, panting heavily.

"I'm sorry Fang..."  
>"What's wrong?"<p>

She had no clue of the lie that I was living for the past three weeks. Every fiber of my soul wanted to tell her the truth before she finds out when it's too late to prevent anything from happening.

"_If you back out now, she's going to know something's going on…what do you do Estheim…what do you do?"_

She leaned up and laid a hand on my head.

"Are you alright?"

I looked back at her with the same carnal desire but I also managed to mix genuine feelings; I had to make sure to let her know that she was loved in this world. I still had to give her hope.

"Sorry…my heart went ballistic and I had to stop for a second,"  
>"Almost had a heart attack?"<br>"Yeah pretty much,"

She nodded and rubbed my head.

"You don't have to if you really don't want to you know…I'll understand,"  
>"It makes you happy Fang and that's what I want,"<br>"Didn't you want this to happen with Light and not me?"

"_Shit…"_

I looked at her in disbelief at what she just said.

"Fang…what did you just say?"  
>"I saw a little…regret in what you were doing,"<br>"What do you mean?"  
>"Hope, you got consumed by the heat of the moment and I saw that you really wanted to make me happy and give me what I wanted so desperately from you but I saw regret in your eyes…you really want this with Lightning instead of me,"<br>"We broke up,"

"_Why am I continuing this lie?"_

"I know…but if your lingering feelings are going to stop you then don't do it…you'll never forgive yourself for doing it,""Fang…I don't want to lose you…none of us do,"  
>"Hope, the care you've shown me for the past three weeks has shown me the light,"<p>

"_Hehe…puns,"_

"I hope my friend can really show you what I did…"  
>"Well I doubt he'll be as good as you in lovemaking,"<p>

I chuckled.

"Light's really lucky to have had you,"  
>"Well…I didn't do that with her,"<br>"Really?"

I nodded slowly.

"Then you're a natural at this, nothing I can think of has ever made me feel so good,"  
>"Sorry I got worked up there…"<br>"You were trying your absolute best to make me happy and you can stop trying so hard; I'm alright now,"  
>"You know Fang if I didn't care for Light so much and if the crystal stasis thing didn't happen, I'd seriously date you,"<p>

She chuckled.

"That's nice of you to say,"  
>"It's true, I seriously don't see how you have problems with men,"<br>"Well…I'm kinda flirtatious don't you think?"  
>"Not really, you haven't really shown much of that during the time we've spent together,"<br>"You think so?"  
>"I know so,"<p>

Fang seemed to be oblivious to the affectionate personality that emerged from her usual strong and tough one.

"Fang…do you seriously want to date this guy tomorrow?"  
>"If you think he's a good person then I believe you,"<br>"Yeah…but how can I be sure that you still won't go off the deep end,"  
>"You just showed me what you would do for me based off of care, not love,"<br>"So…"  
>"I knew from the start that you didn't do this cause you loved me, you did it because you didn't want me to kill myself and you wanted to make me happy,"<br>"Then why did you let me do this?"  
>"What part of I have feelings for you do you not understand?"<br>"What do I have to do to get you over that?"

Fang sighed.

"If what you're saying is true then me continuing this shouldn't be helping you, it should be hurting you,"  
>"You should get back together with Light,"<br>"Why?"  
>"She's always been there, I've been frozen as a crystal for 510 years,"<br>"Fang, if you need to vent your emotions now I won't stop you,"  
>"What?"<p>

I turned to her with a serious face.

"You have a lot of bottled up emotions inside of you, I can see it in your eyes,"  
>"I know I do but I can't do that Hope, when I let this happen before...I was selfish,"<br>"No...you can't help your feelings, if you seriously want me to do this I will for you,"  
>"I can't ask you to have sex with me Hope; it wouldn't settle well in your head,"<br>"I'm willing to sacrifice it; my first kiss wasn't with Light anyways,"  
>"It wasn't?"<p>

I then proceeded to tell her all about Liona. She seemed shocked that I did what I did despite my feelings for Light. She was even more shocked that Light still waited for me despite all of the events that occured.

"There's no way Light could ever say no to you if you asked her to be with you again,"  
>"Well...I suppose not,"<br>"Go back to her,"

She smiled.

"Don't worry about me and my needs,"  
>"I have to Fang; you tell me that you're fine but it's plain and obvious that you're not,"<br>"Hope..."  
>"I can't promise you that I can go all the way...but we've gone this far,"<br>"Why are you doing this Hope?"

I took a deep breath.

"Because I don't want you to get hurt Fang; these feelings you say you have for me...I wish I could return them, really I do but Light was there first...if she said no at first then by all means this would be different...but we were together for three years, I waited so long for her to return my feelings and she finally did,"  
>"Hope...something tells me that break up of yours wasn't done for the reason you told me, I want the truth,"<p>

I sighed.

"Fang, I told Light that you tried to kill yourself and she said that I should be with you, not out of pity but because I genuinely wanted to make you feel better,"  
>"She approved of this?"<br>"I don't think she would've seen what we just did here coming,"  
>"So the break up-"<br>"Was to make you think that I was single again, so I could truly make you happy and prevent you from making such a terrible mistake,"  
>"So...you faked everything?"<br>"No Fang...everything that we did was real,"

She shook her head.

"You're lying,"  
>"Fang, look me in the eyes now and tell me I'm lying,"<p>

She couldn't.

"I did everything for you and I knew I was risking my relationship with Light to do this and she understood that; she wanted me to help you even if it meant I had to..."  
>"Practically cheat on her?"<br>"Pretty much..."  
>"Hope...you have no idea how much of a bumbling idiot you are,"<p>

I sighed.

"You had me think that everything we did was because you loved me..."

I sighed even deeper...she probably hated me now.

"But you risked everything you held dear to you to make me happy and you did it out of your own free will; no one told you to do this,"

She smiled at me.

"That more than makes up for that lie and I'm so grateful to have friends like you and Light,"

She embraced me.

"Thank you for being there for me..."

"I always will,"

She kissed me again and I found myself kissing back.

_"This is it...you have to choose now...Fang or Lightning,"_

"Fang...give me a second, I'm going to call Light,"

"Ok,"

I walked into the bathroom and called her.

_"Hello?"_

Still wide awake even at 11pm.

"Claire...it's me,  
><em>"Hope? You sound strange, is everything ok?"<br>_"Yeah...I told Fang everything and she understands,"  
><em>"Oh...can you put me onto speakerphone with her?"<em>

I did as she asked.

_"Hi Fang,"  
><em>"What's up princess?"  
><em>"Listen...I'm really sorry about-"<br>_"No need to apologize; I talked to Hope about all that already,"  
><em>"I'm really sorry Fang..."<br>_"It's alright,"

Fang was smiling. I took the phone off speakerphone and returned to the bathroom where she couldn't hear me.

"Claire...there's...a problem,"  
><em>"What's wrong?"<br>_"Fang...wants me to have sex with her,"

I heard her audibly gasp.

"I don't want to because of you Light...I'm in a relationship with you not her,"  
><em>"Will this solve her problem?"<br>_"It's the last thing she wants...after that she said she'll meet Cid,"  
><em>"Then do it,"<br>_

_"WHAT? What the HELL is she saying?"_

"No...I lost my first kiss to Liona, I'm not losing my virginity to anyone but you,"

She again audibly gasped and I knew she had to be a tomato's shade behind the veil of the phone.

_"Hope...use a condom, you won't lose your virginity,"  
><em>"It's my first time, I refuse to do it with anyone but you,"

She sighed.

"...If I could see you again...and if we did that..."  
><em>"Then you'd help Fang?"<br>_"Yes and as I said, I'm not doing this because I have feelings for her...I'm trying to save her life,"  
><em>"Ok...I'll come tomorrow,"<em>

She hung up and I returned to Fang.

"What's wrong?"  
>"Fang...I'll introduce you to my friend on Saturday instead of tomorrow,"<br>"Why?"  
>"I have a plan...Fang, I'm going to give you what you want,"<br>"But-"  
>"I'm consummating my relationship with Light, that way I'll have no regrets,"<br>"You mean you're going to shag her?"

I laughed.

"Yeah...well, I'll try..."

She smiled.

"You're going to make your first time with her and then you're going to do it with me?"  
>"If that's what you want,"<p>

Fang shook her head.

"Wouldn't she get mad at you? I'm surprised she hasn't decked you in the face yet for this, it's really still considered cheating you know,"  
>"Our relationship is different that all others, trust me on that,"<br>"So you're really going to do this for me huh?"

I nodded.

"Why are you so selfless?"  
>"Because you guys didn't have to help me all those years ago, it's time I gave back to you guys,"<p>

She again embraced me.

"We need more men like you in this world,"  
>"Well...most men would take advantage of this,"<br>"I know, it's not everyday you get two women like me and Light that are madly in love with you,"

I chuckled.

"Yeah you're right,"

I turned to her.

"Fang? Do you want to continue what we were doing before?"  
>"But-"<br>"Not sex...just everything before it,"  
>"Hope..."<br>"I already started it and after tonight, Light will be here so if you want to do this, I suggest you do it now,"

She didn't think twice before she poured all her remaining emotions through kissing, touching and teasing before she fell asleep. I remained awake though.

_"Everything that just happened was never supposed to...now I'll forever have on my conscience that I cheated on her...and I didn't even resist it, this carnal side of my just took over...perhaps I shouldn't stay in this...maybe...I had to be alone for the greater good because the last thing I want to do is to extinguish the hope I gave to her life..."_

My mind dwelled on this for a while before sleep took hold of me as well.


	23. Is It Really Ok?

Chapter 23- Is It Really Ok?

I woke up to find Fang, still peacefully asleep on my chest. After that night, it wouldn't surprise me that she could sleep so well. I silently moved her off of me and changed; Light would probably be here soon. Fang woke up when I shut the bathroom door after showering.

"Hey, slept well?"  
>"Never better in my life,"<p>

I smiled.

"That's good,"  
>"Thank you again Hope,"<br>"It's what I'm here for,"

I smiled and hugged her.

"Light's gonna be here soon and unless you want her to see you like this, I suggest you change,"  
>"Wouldn't it be interesting?"<p>

My eyes widened.

"Imagine a threesome with us,"  
>"Fang!"<p>

She laughed hysterically.

"Just kidding handsome,"

She walked up to me and again pressed herself against me to kiss me.

"I'm eternally grateful for everything you've done for me,"  
>"You're welcome,"<p>

She went to change and she left shortly after. It wasn't long before a knock on my door was heard. I opened the door to see Light.

"Hope..."  
>"Hi Cl-"<p>

I didn't even get to finish before she practically decked me in the face. I fell to the ground.

"You idiot!"

I rose to my feet, still partially stunned from the blow she landed across my cheekbone. She then clung to me.

"Don't ever do that again..."  
>"I won't...I promise..."<br>"I don't want to get mad at you Hope but I really find it hard to believe that you're doing this for the right reasons...you cheated on me,"  
>"I know...and I'm telling you that I didn't do what I did with her to cheat on you...I was worried for her life, we all were,"<br>"Hope...that's what scares me..."  
>"What do you mean?"<br>"What if she doesn't stop at just the sex..."

She had a point there.

"She gave me her word,"  
>"Love overcomes any word of any person,"<p>

She was right.

"I won't have anything to do with her anymore, if I do that with her I will not even think about giving her anymore,"  
>"She's...very selfish,"<br>"It's her past Claire,"  
>"I know..."<br>"And she actually wasn't selfish; she wanted me to stay with you,"  
>"She said that?"<br>"She always told me to stay with you Claire, when she still believed our lie, she even told me to go back to you and leave her,"  
>"So...she's-"<br>"Being selfless,"

She looked down.

"This relationship is _**definitely**_ complicated,"  
>"Not for much longer,"<p>

I held her hands and leaned my forehead against hers.

"I promise...I'll make this up to you,"  
>"Hope..."<br>"Right now Claire the only thing on my mind is you and quite frankly, you're all that _**should **_be,"

She smiled and a few tears fell from her eyes.

"I love you...so much Claire..."  
>"I love you too Hope..."<br>"...Are you ready?"

I looked down for a second. For some reason...I felt as if I were taking advantage of her good nature. Any average woman would've quit from the moment I kissed another woman but she stood through it all rather than give up on it. She chose to bear the pain...just as she did with Liona. She was my choice and she would be my light...pun intended.

"Is...it really ok?"  
>"Hope...if anyone deserves me...it's you,"<br>"But I...I betrayed you...twice..."  
>"The first time was my fault and the second wasn't either of us, if you didn't do what you did, Fang wouldn't be with us,"<p>

I scoffed.

"I'm amazed..."  
>"With what?"<br>"All the crap you've put up with from me,"  
>"What do you mean?"<br>"You practically gave me permission to cheat on you for Fang's better good, you waited with the Liona episode, all of this..."  
>"Because I love you that much Hope..."<p>

She put a hand on my cheek.

"I'm willing to wait through anything...because you're my Hope,"  
>"And you're my Light,"<p>

She tip-toed and kissed me and my hands traveled to her waist. I shut the door behind me with my foot and lifted her into my arms, carrying her over to the bed while never breaking the passion between our mouths. My tongue entered her mouth and she moaned softly down my throat when my hands went under her shirt and touched her skin. She lifted her arms up and I removed her shirt to reveal the same black bra with pink polka dots.

"You remembered that I liked this?"  
>"I'll never forget how much this meant to you,"<p>

She removed my shirt and looked at my body again.

"You got more toned,"  
>"All for you,"<p>

She smiled and pushed me down. I kept myself suspended with my elbows and she straddled me as she leaned down to once again connect our lips. I moved back to the wall and held onto her waist as the tongue lock began once again. She tasted so damn _**good **_and it wasn't because of the taste of spearmint from her mouth but because it was her; no one could ever replace her as the one I truly would always love for the rest of my days.

I drew her shorts down and I was delighted to see the other half of her two piece. Her hair wasn't in its usual slightly stiffened shape but was let out completely. She definitely chose well with the cherry blossom scented body wash and/or lotion she used. Her skin felt as amazing as ever, enhanced even further by the even stronger feelings coming from my heart in our current act.

I leaned up, cradling her while one of my hands traveled up and down her leg, slowing down to an agonizingly light glide over her thigh. I don't know why I liked her thighs so much or maybe I had some hidden fetish. Whatever the reason, it was still Light and that was reason enough to love it. I stopped kissing her and moved to her neck and slowly to her collarbone. She moaned my name in the most angelic tone I'd ever heard from her lips.

"Claire...oh my god you're so amazing...you're _**addictive**_,"  
>"Huh?"<br>"You're..._**delicious**_,"

She blushed.

"You've never said that before,"  
>"I've always wanted to tell you but I didn't know how you'd react,"<br>"Then enlighten me, I'm still new to this,"

I smiled.

"With pleasure,"

To my surprise, during the next two minutes of lip locking, she grinded her hips against mine sending an unknown million volts of electricity and copious amounts of red hot pleasure through my body at the speed of superhuman nerves. I groaned audibly.

"Did I...do something wrong?"

I pinned her to the bed, my carnal desire for her beginning to show itself again.

"Not even close..."

My lips moved steadily towards her chest. I made sure to move slowly and make every kiss last as long as possible and as light as possible. My plan worked; her moans became almost _desperate_. The only reason she wasn't begging was probably due to her ungodly willpower to not give into her own carnal desires and to not show weakness.

My mouth reached her chest and I kissed the valley between her breasts. Another angelic moan of desperation escaped her lips and I locked my eyes with her, non-verbally asking if it was alright to remove her bra. She nodded and I slowly clicked it open. She however kept them hidden by almost instantly throwing her hand over them to keep the bra on when she saw me turn away.

"Claire...I...can't,"  
>"Hope...it's ok,"<p>

Sincerity itself spoke through her with those three words. I turned back to see her smile at me. It wasn't just a regular smile; this smile made it perfectly clear that she forgave me for my sins and that this would prove to me that she was fine with it. She dropped her arm and I removed the bra.

_"I always thought they were perky...but they really didn't look that big through the clothes she normally wears,"_

I leaned into her and placed my hand on her left and my mouth over the right. She instantly cried out in pleasure as I applied gentle suction on the erect nipple. Her head pointed skyward and she leaned back, allowing me more access as I began to lick. She melted and her cries became louder and more pleasure filled.

"Oh...my god...that feels _**amazing**_,"

She started to take heavy breaths as she was releasing moans faster than she could inhale air. I moved to the other breast and achieved the same result. Her moans enticed me more and more until the pressure in my pants became painful. I stopped after a few more minutes and she pinned me against the wall before once again grinding her hips against me. The difference between the first time and now was that she did it _**hard**_.

She unbuckled my pants and removed them before teasingly moving up like a stalking leopard back up to my face.

"You're...making it very hard for me to maintain control..."  
>"Or am I just making you hard?<p>

_"Fast learner...gotta give her credit,"_

She smiled seductively at me and grinded her hips again into me. With the previous layer removed, I felt her wetness through my boxers. She was definitely ready. I lay her back and removed her panties, steadily kissing my way down her legs. She was now in all her natural glory. At that point, Lightning "Claire" Farron became **the most** beautiful thing I had ever seen in my life. She lay on her back and I removed my boxers.

I positioned myself.

"Are you ready?"

She nodded and I slowly entered her for the first time. Forget any other feeling of pleasure; this was the most intense feeling I had ever experienced. She cried out and I sensed the pain within her tone.

"I'm...sorry,"

I tried to pull out to prevent her from feeling any pain. She caught my hand within a milisecond.

"Hope...it's supposed to hurt the first time...I'll get used to it,"

I reluctantly re-entered her and she cried out again. I continued the motion until I stopped hearing pain in her voice. I sped up and she clung to me. Her nails dug into my back. After several minutes, she leaned up and began to grind herself against me.

_"Oh...my...god...so...good,"_

My hands shot to her waist and my lips returned to hers again as she increased her pace, never breaking the lock her arms had around me. She moved at an unreal speed and I wasn't sure I was sober with all the pleasure cursing through me. I began to feel dizzy as the hormones rushed through me like data through a computer. I found my arms turning to mush and I couldn't lean up anymore as I sunk to the wall with her never breaking her pace. I found myself moaning much like her. Pound after pound, thrust after thrust and bounce after bounce; I was getting more and more tired by the second but I refused to rest until I made it perfectly clear to her that I meant every word when I said I would make it up to her.

I leaned up and lay her on her side before proceeding to place my head behind hers. I held one leg in the air with one hand and continued. Her hands gripped the sheets and I swear if they were paper, they'd be shreds now. What was supposed to be minutes felt like an eternity before finally, I lost steam and I felt myself spill inside of her. I gently lowered her leg and pulled out, hugging her close to me. She moved back and practically melded with me.

"I told you…"  
>"I believed you the whole time,"<p>

I knew she was smiling evilly.

"Well, if you had any doubt, is it now gone?"  
>"What is this doubt you speak of Hope?"<p>

Soon, I started laughing.

"Ok Claire I understand,"

She turned around and kissed me.

"I'm glad you do,"  
>"You know, this is probably the worst time to say something like this but have I told you that you're the best thing that's ever happened to me?"<br>"You've pretty much given me that title,"  
>"But you know that,"<br>"Ditto,"

I drew the covers over us.

"I don't think I can help Fang now…if I wasn't betraying you then, I'm sure as hell doing it if that happens,"  
>"Hope…you know I'm fine with it,"<br>"Which is what I-"

She laid a finger on my mouth.

"We spoke about this already…I've said all I had to say…now it's completely up to you Hope,"

I nodded slowly.

"I'm still…sorry about all that's happened,"  
>"I know you are and you're going to make it up to me,"<br>"Like how you made it up to me just now?"

She smiled.

"Well, maybe not like this but you're going to have a lot of work cut out for you,"  
>"You're the best…"<br>"Tell me something I haven't established about myself,"  
>"Ok…you're really good at what you do in bed,"<br>"Really?"  
>"If I didn't know you so well, I'd never believe that you were a virgin,"<br>"Well…I just did what came naturally…that and I…read a little,"  
>"Oh did you?"<p>

She blushed and I laughed.

"It's not a bad thing, so I guess you sort of planned for us to…"  
>"I'm surprised it didn't happen sooner,"<br>"What do you mean?"  
>"I thought you would've lost it when you first saw the set,"<br>"I nearly did but I didn't feel ready,"

She shook her head.

"Well…let's hope Cid can make his mark on her,"  
>"You spoke to him?"<br>"I told him that I have a friend who's single and interested in meeting him,"  
>"You didn't tell him it was Fang?"<br>"Of course not, that would defeat the purpose of it being a surprise,"

She smirked at me.

"Sly devil,"

I childishly stuck out my tongue.

"Don't you have class today?"  
>"I'm skipping the one class I have today; I can make it up tomorrow,"<br>"Why skip?"  
>"Because you <em><strong>exhausted<strong>_ me,"

She laughed loudly.

"Ok…I guess I might as well sleep too, you did almost the same to me,"  
>"I <em>tired<em> out a _**soldier**_?"  
>"Don't push it,"<p>

I laughed again.

"Alright, good afternoon,"  
>"Good afternoon…"<p> 


	24. The Limits Of Selflessness

Chapter 24- The Limits Of Selflessness

"Hey, can I come in?"

I moved aside and allowed her to enter.

"Well...so what's the matter Fang?"  
>"Nothing's wrong at all, quite happy actually,"<br>"Ok..."

I half expected for her to pounce on me from out of nowhere but that never came.

"Well, you came to get what you wanted right?"

For some reason completely unknown to me, she chuckled.

"What's so funny?"  
>"You are,"<p>

_"Huh?"_

"Well how can I put this Hope?"

She walked up to me and pulled me to the bed.

"You're a great man Hope, gotta let you know that but you do of course realize that you're still hands down the biggest idiot I've ever seen,"  
>"What do you mean?"<br>"Let's start with this..."

She leaned at me. I didn't stop her and before I knew it, she smacked me upside the head.

"You're supposed to stop me,"  
>"Why? I promised you,"<p>

Fang slapped her forehead.

"Alright, guess it's better I just tell you bluntly,"  
>"What the hell are you talking about?"<br>"I never intended to have sex with you in the first place,"

_"Ok...not that I'm disappointed or something...but WHAT?"_

"Explain,"  
>"Hope...are you seriously that brainless to see that what you did was enough?"<br>"You mean-"  
>"Hope, you saved me from the moment you spent those three weeks with me and that night when we did what we did was pretty much all I needed from you,"<br>"Then why ask for sex?"  
>"Because I wanted to see your reasons and you passed...that and I actually wanted it at first but I changed my mind,"<br>"Fang...you **_tricked_** me?"  
>"Yeah I did, well…partially; I have to admit I did <em><strong>really<strong>_ want you but then what does that accomplish?"

I half wanted to punch her in the face; she caused me a lot of mental conflict and she just said that she's fine?

"Alright, you and Light evidently don't know a damn thing about relationships so I'm gonna give you a quick rundown,"  
>"First off, unless you two are in an open relationship, don't even begin to look at another woman,"<p>

My eyes narrowed and my face turned unamused.

"You tried to kill yourself..."  
>"And sometimes, you need to ignore the problems of others, I'm not particularly speaking of this case but you need to stick with the one you love,"<br>"So we had an open relationship?"  
>"Kid, I don't know what the hell you have going...it's a mess if you ask me,"<br>"Because of you..."  
>"Hey I'll be honest here, I didn't expect you to be kind enough to completely and utterly put your relationship and Light's love on the line to make me happy, which brings me to my next point: stop trying to solve the problems of others on your own,"<br>"But-"  
>"Did you ever once very highly consider that what you're doing is wrong Hope?"<br>"Your life was at stake..."  
>"Nothing under the sun makes it ok to cheat on your lover,"<p>

I sighed; she had a point there. Up till now I've tried to solve the problem by spoon feeding it. I fed it and it began to want more until I was going to unknowingly walk into a dark room, never to return to the light...wow, for once a pun that's not funny but intended.

"But I have to say Hope, the mere fact that you would go so far to save a friend, I can't even begin to imagine how far you'd go to save her,"

I looked at her and she pat me on the head.

"Look kid, you need to be able to suck in your gut and say no, even to suicidals,"  
>"I will...from now on,"<br>"That's the spirit,"  
>"So...you never at all intended to this?"<br>"Hope, you have to realize that despite the things I want, I can't get it all; that's spoiling me not helping,"  
>"I don't-"<br>"Let me finish,"

I listened.

"Are you that blind to see how bad of a thing it is to do that with me right now? Especially after what happened yesterday?"  
>"You-"<br>"Heard everything because I didn't really leave,"  
>"So you heard us..."<p>

She laughed.

"Gotta tell you I didn't expect Light to be a screamer,"  
>"You really are flirtatious,"<br>"Hey don't hate,"

I rose to my feet.

"If what I did was enough, why are you here now?"  
>"Because I thought about everything that happened and I realized I had to tell you all of this,"<p>

She took a breath.

"Truthfully anything can happen to anyone and anything you hold dear to you can be taken in an instant, there's nothing you can do to stop it if it decides to do so,"

I sighed.

"But it's what we do before and after it is taken from us that defines each of our own realities and what defines us as individuals,"

_"Nice speech,"_

"For you kid, you really still have no idea of the do's and don'ts of a relationship do you?"

I shook my head.

"Step into my office then,"

For the next two hours, she spoke about everything I did wrong. Everything from the moment I asked Light if I could have sex with her to even expecting for it to be done today and I was enlightened.

"Get it now kid?"  
>"Yeah...I understand and now I feel like a moron,"<br>"Forget about it, how about a drink?"

She pulled out a bottle of chardonay out of her bag. (For those of you who don't know, think champagne but sweet)

"Sure why not,"

I took a glass from her.

"I gotta be honest when I tell you that I really did what this to happen but I realized what kind of pressure I put on you two after my attempted suicide ,"  
>"Which is probably why you're not all over me now?"<br>"Pretty much,"

I laughed.

"Fang I gotta to tell you, what you did now that I know everything was 100% Grade A bitchiness,"  
>"I know which is why I apologized,"<br>"But…thank you,"  
>"Thank you?"<br>"For enlightening me,"

She smiled and nodded.

"Sorry for tricking you but I had to teach you a lesson one way or another,"

My phone went off. It was a text message from...Cid? He came back a day early.

"Fang...thanks again for enlightening me,"  
>"No problem but can I do just one more thing before we put this behind us?"<br>"Sure go for it,"

She practically teleported in front of me and embraced me.

"You're an idiot...an absolute idiot for all of what you've done...but you were an idiot for all the right reasons and that's why you'll always be better than most men out there: you'll put yourself before everyone, which will make you a great person,"  
>"I don't think so..."<br>"Are you kidding me? Hope, everything you've done up to now was based solely on my needs, did you ever once consider yours?"  
>"That's the bad part...part of me wanted this,"<br>"You mean that carnal side of yours?"  
>"Yes..."<br>"You've got to control and lock that out; now that you know everything about relationships you've got to keep it in check,"  
>"Yeah I'm trying..."<br>"Good,"

She rose to her feet.

"I think I'll go now, my bitchiness probably just reached ungodly levels,"  
>"Not before I introduce you to someone,"<p>

I opened the door to reveal Cid. Fang's eyes didn't change. Cid's however were _**shocked**_.

"Hello there nice to meet you,"

Fang politely held out her hand.

"You don't remember me at all do you?"  
>"Unfortunately not; don't remember meeting you before,"<br>"Fang...it's me Cid..."  
>"Not ringing a bell,"<p>

Cid walked up to her and took one of her hands.

"Where I seen you before, I think I remember those eyes eyes eyes,"

_"What the...what in the blue hell is he singing..."_

Fangs eyes widened.

"Cid...high school Cid who always found that exotic music?"  
>"There you go,"<p>

She embraced him and he returned it.

"Its been a long time,"  
>"Yeah it has,"<p>

Cid turned to me.

"So she's the one?"  
>"Yes sir,"<p>

He chuckled.

"He's the one?"  
>"Yeah,"<p>

They laughed in unison.

"Well now, I certainly didn't expect to see you again,"  
>"Likewise,"<br>"But I have a question for you Cid...how are you still alive?"  
>"You mean after you and Vanille disappeared from Oerba all those years ago?"<br>"Yes,"  
>"Crystal stasis,"<p>

_"Headmaster Cid was a l'Cie?"_

"Alright...I could really use some sleep now you guys...would you mind taking this reunion else where?"

_"Lord knows I don't need anymore mindfucking,"_

"Ahh no problem my boy, I'll see you tomorrow,"  
>"Get some sleep Hope cause you never know what's hiding inside the closet,"<p>

They left and I let out a breath.

"You can come out now,"

Light opened the closet and stepped out.

"Think she knew I was in there?"  
>"Maybe,"<br>"So...are we still complicated?"

I smiled.

"No...I think I'm going to stick with the brightest ray of light in my life right now,"  
>"You were right; Fang did lecture you on relationships,"<br>"She's pretty spontaneous and I guess me saying yes to everything finally triggered her conscience,"  
>"So...what now?"<br>"I think I deserved to be punished,"  
>"For all of what's transpired for the past month?"<br>"Yeah...I feel like an asshole...especially after all the stuff that Fang told me,"  
>"What did she tell you?"<p>

_"Am I seriously about to lecture Lightning Farron?"_

"The main point is what she explained about us...apparently our relationship is a "mess" and also it comes closest to the meaning of an open relationship,"  
>"Explain?"<br>"Open relationships are apparently when either person allows the other to go out with others,"  
>"Ok...continue,"<br>"I basically hit the borderline between that and a regular one; the only thing that kept me from making it 100% horrible was the fact that I didn't do it because I wanted her, I did it because I wanted to save her life,"  
>"Oh...so that's how,""<br>"Yeah..."  
>"Then you really are an asshole,"<p>

I sucked it up; I deserved it.

"But it's like Fang said, its what we do before and after something is taken from us that defines us as individuals,"  
>"Nothing was taken from me..."<br>"I wouldn't be so sure Hope, your mind wasn't in one place; you tried to make us all happy at the risk of everything you held dear,"  
>"Yeah..which is you...that's why I think I'm an asshole and a moron,"<p>

She nodded and hugged me.

"I risked us Claire...the single most important thing my entire life in order to save someone I don't have any true feelings for apart from that of a close friend,"  
>"That's the level of selflessness people need in this world; if more men had that there'd be no such thing as corruption,"<br>"Yeah...you're probably right,"

There was a moment of silence.

"So...you have a lusty side that she knows about huh?"  
>"Let's not get into that...save that for another day,"<p>

My hands went to my face and covered my eyes and forehead. I appreciated her trying to lighten the mood and all but I was really and truly in distress; I didn't even begin to realize what I was doing the whole time I was involved in this...man I can't even think of the word to describe this.

"You were just trying to help Fang as best as you possibly could,"  
>"And I didn't even consider what could happen if we actually knew about relationships...that's stuff I should know Claire, not find out after the damage is done already,"<br>"Not all damage is irreversible,"  
>"Because you're more forgiving than The Maker himself,"<br>"Yes...but you really didn't know,"  
>"Is that why you decked me and then hugged me when you saw me the first time?"<p>

She nodded slowly.

"I wasn't sure if I should've been angry at you for giving yourself to another woman or if I should continue to be at your side because to me...you're worth all the pain..."  
>"Thanks..."<br>"Well, we can put this behind us now can't we?"  
>"Are you kidding me? People are probably going to notice and start asking questions and stuff and if that gets caught in the wind of the social network, I'll be the most hated person in this town,"<br>"Too bad no one will know,"

I laughed.

"It's been...chaotic,"  
>"Our relationship?"<br>"Yeah..."  
>"How about we just call what happened a "temporary open relationship","<br>"That certainly sounds and looks better than everything that happened,"  
>"Yeah,"<p>

I laid down and she joined me.

"Round two?"  
>"I'm still tired..."<br>"Not sex Claire, another massage!"  
>"Why would you say round two?"<br>"You think I didn't feel your attempts at soothing my back pain this morning?"

She blushed.

"I read something on it and..."  
>"You were completely convinced I was asleep huh?"<br>"...Yes,"  
>"You could've asked you know, it feels better when you know it's coming,"<br>"Are you saying it felt terrible?"  
>"Your hands are pretty rough,"<p>

She pouted and I laughed.

"I'm kidding, so you read and I bet you tried some of the things I did too because I felt some of my muscles actually start to release tension,"  
>"Yeah...I did,"<br>"Thank you...it was great,"  
>"Thanks for the compliment,"<p>

I cracked my knuckles.

"Your turn, I'll get the peppermint oil,"

She turned to me and kissed me before I rose to get the oil.

All was clear. Maybe not exactly well but this chaos was finally over with...for now at least I'm in the light at the end of the tunnel...but who's to say another one won't come our way? One can only hope.

_"Puntastic mind, sheesh I gotta stop that,"_


	25. Author's Note 2

**Hello fellow readers and writers. This'll be the second note I've done for this story.**

**I know it's pretty unusual thus far and I apologize if I distressed anyone with the gigantic twists and turns and also due to my occasional inability to be clear with some of the things I wrote thus far. I've been writing this story entirely on my BlackBerry due to being unable to be at a computer to do so instead. That's pretty much the reason why you see some grammatical errors and punctuation errors as well.**

**A lot of the time as well, I only find time to write late at night and it's pretty difficult to try to write something with a half asleep brain but I'm trying my best to keep this thing flowing. It may have crashed for a lot of you but I'm not out of ideas for this one yet. The quick updates are due to the fact that I sometimes find myself unable to know when I will be able to upload them. If any of you reading this note are fans of mine, you know how long I am capable of taking to update my stories simply due to my busy lifestyle (hey, college and such isn't exactly easy and neither is 2 summer jobs).**

**Again readers, sorry for the sloppy work and I'll do my best to improve it. I'll keep a better eye out for the errors as I type away on my phone and hopefully, I'll be able to get a computer to write instead cause lord knows a phone is just plain ANNOYING.**

**Special thanks to AssassinZAssassin for all the correction pointers in his reviews; they haven't gone unnoticed.**

**Happy reading and I hope you'll enjoy the rest of this story and any others to come.**

**Yours Truly,**

**Wandering Letters**

**P.S- For all you reviewers who say things are "overly ridiculous", read the summary of the story. "Truthfully, anything can happen". Embrace infinity guys! That's the theme I'm rolling with in this one. When I put a summary as philosophical as that, it means I got that theme going XP**

**P.S #2- Forgot to say thanks to Pookylicious for all her reviews as well. You've been a faithful fan to all my work and you help me get the drive to continue doing this despite my deteriorating mind for writing XP I'm also happy to reveal a collaborative fic in the works between the both of us. We won't tell you what it's on but it's coming soon to a computer near you.**

**P.S #3- For all of you who say "Fang would never do that" or "Light would never say this" or anything of that effect, read the summary again. "Contains OOC". Once again sticking with the anything can happen theme XP**

**Peace out!**


	26. Surely The Right Decision

Chapter 25- Surely The Right Decision

"I can't believe you graduate in one month...everything went by so fast,"

"Yeah no kidding,"

Time flew by in a flash since that day. I had to say that for once, things were flowing smoothly for once. Fang and Cid ended up dating and they were perfectly happy with each other even though Fang would proceed with a flirtatious move on me every now and again, not that Cid or I really minded; it was mostly for kicks. Light and I got even closer, to the point were she came to campus on a regular basis and would stay for months on end. Really and truly, she'd might as well be my wife with the amount of time we spent together. We also got to go back to Bodhum to see the rest of the family. Snow and Serah decided to "adopt" Vanille and treated her like a daughter despite the fact that she was probably a hundred times older than the both of them combined. We even managed to get back in contact with Sazh and Dajh. Dajh was in high school and he seemed to be into law unlike Sazh who was a salesman. We agreed to have a reunion once I graduated from here but for now, my focus was on MCATS. I already took them and to be totally honest, I had no idea how I did on them. They weren't too difficult questions but it is the hardest exam I've ever taken before so anything can happen. I was however done with classes so I had a lot of free time on my hands.

"So I guess this is your last visit here huh?"  
>"Where are you going to go after here?"<br>"To live with you or near you,"  
>"You're always welcome in my home, you know that Hope,"<br>"Yeah...but I now that I think about it; I should get my own place,"  
>"You'd might as well; you'll be making so much money that you probably can't spend it all at once even if you tried,"<p>

I chuckled and kissed her.

"Claire...how many years have we been together?"  
>"About 5 years now,"<br>"Would you...want to move in with me?"  
>"You know I'd love to...but there's Serah and Snow to worry about..."<br>"Snow can take care of her; he's been doing a pretty good job thus far don't you think?"

She sighed.

"I guess you're right,"  
>"You can go there as often as you need to...but then I suppose I can't force you,"<br>"I'll keep it in mind...focus on getting the house first,"  
>"I was actually designing one during my time at UOP,"<br>"You took architecture?"  
>"Yeah a few classes in it,"<br>"May I see?"

I pulled out a tube and took out the blueprint I drew.

"It's not professional but I think if I showed it to an architect, he or she could probably fine tune it,"  
>"Hope...you're incredible you know that?"<br>"Huh?"  
>"Your plans are nearly accurate right down to the square foot measurements,"<br>"How do you know?"  
>"I've seen plans before and these measurements seem realistic and feasible,"<p>

I smiled and put the plans back into the tube.

"It's a start I guess,"  
>"And you want me to live in this house with you?"<br>"I would love that but it's entirely up to you; you can stay with Serah and Snow but you should know by now that you're welcome in my home at anytime you wish,"

Her arms wrapped around my neck.

"I'll think about it...ok?"  
>"Alright..."<p>

She kissed me.

"These MCAT results are scaring the hell out of me,"  
>"A genius like you?"<br>"That exam decides whether my all years of work and school were for naught or not,"  
>"You'll be fine...I know you will,"<p>

I smiled.

"You're the best you know that?"  
>"I could say the same for you,"<br>"Really now? How so?"  
>"Do I have to get into details?"<br>"Only if you want to make me feel better about these exams,"  
>"Well..."<p>

I backed her against a wall. Even now, she still blushed whenever I got affectionate with her.

"You're smart,"  
>"Mhmm..."<p>

I kissed her neck. She took an audible breath.

"You're handsome,"  
>"Yes..."<p>

I continued my torture on her neck as my hands went to her waist.

"You're...the best boyfriend a woman could ask for,"  
>"Ahh...very nice,"<p>

My torture decreased in speed to make every moment even more lingering and she started to moan softly.

"You're...really good at _**this**_..."  
>"Is this the part you enjoy most?"<p>

She smiled and lifted my head to face her.

"No...but I _**definitely **_don't dislike it,"  
>"Really now?"<p>

I got my answer when she pushed me onto the bed. She threw off the long sleeved white sweater she was wearing. She went to the mall a few days ago and I guess this must've been one of the things she bought. It was an ivory white two piece lingerie set. She also got her hair done; the scent of roses and the sheen that emitted from her pink tendrils amazed me. I don't know how she did but everytime I looked at her in this state, she always surpassed the previous look and I had to admit, there were times I really wondered if she was really only mine; any man who would get the chance to have a night with her would do so from just how _**irresistible **_she looked. Even now as she slowly made her way up to my face from a teasing crawl, I still found myself nervous over seeing her like this; I had only has sex with her once and that was to consummate our relationship. I had never once gone further than this since that day.

"That's...new,"  
>"I hoped you like it..."<p>

"_Hehe…puns again,"_

"That's one _**hell**_ of an understatement,"

She smirked and ran her finger up my bare chest. That feeling was driving me _**crazy**_. After all the years we've been together, she definitely learned everything there was to know about seduction as well as lovemaking...well, at least everything before it; the one time of making love to her didn't really give me that impressive of an expectation of what she could do simply because she tried to make it more emotional rather than to make it enjoyable; it was the first time for the both of us after all.

"I'm still glad..."  
>"Hmm? Glad for what?"<br>"For giving us that chance five years ago..."

She must've been referring to when Liona left us and when we began our relationship.

"You know I'm still sorry for everything right?"  
>"Yes...I know and I've already forgiven you; there's no need to feel guilty,"<br>"That still to this day amazes me,"  
>"What does?"<br>"Every other woman would've probably called me scum for all of the things that I did with other women in our relationship and thrown me away like a used twinkie wrapper,"

She laughed softly.

"I think you're _**way**_ better than any twinkie,"

It was my turn to laugh.

"Glad you think so,"  
>"No...I <em><strong>know<strong>_ so,"

She reached my mouth and she leaned toward me to my surprise, she pulled the same move I did a few years back. She completely led me on.

"Ouch...that hurt,"  
>"Learned your lesson?"<br>"A long time ago, which is why I don't do that anymore,"  
>"Ok then this is the last time I'll do that,"<br>"You're evil sometimes..."

She laughed before she straddled me.

"Don't pretend you don't like it; you're a _**terrible**_ liar,"  
>"Oh really now?"<br>"Yes you are Hope,"  
>"Are you trying to say that I couldn't get away with lying to you about anything?"<br>"That's _**exactly**_ what I'm saying,"

I smirked.

"Next I suppose you're going to ask me questions,"  
>"Oh we're playing truth or dare now? Minus the dare of course,"<br>"I know you've wanted to do that since you pushed me onto the bed,"

She turned to face me and I sat up and faced her as well.

"Let's take turns asking questions we've always wanted to ask one another,"  
>"Ok...what's your favorite thing about me?"<br>"A better question to ask is what _isn't _a favorite thing about you; you're my Light and everything about you makes you my favorite,"  
>"Be specific?"<br>"Fine...I guess it's the sheer love you have for me...you forgave such horrible and stupid things I've done in the past and you're still with me even now,"  
>"<em>Good<em> answer..."

I smiled.

"My turn and my question is the same as yours,"  
>"Your selflessness; you risked everything to make everyone else around you happy and the mere fact that you're willing to do that means that you would be the best friend of everyone you'd come to know,"<br>"That was a mouthful,"  
>"My turn, who's the best kisser, me, Liona or Fang?"<p>

I chuckled.

"Well...to be completely honest with you...Fang,"  
>"So I'm not better than her,"<br>"If you mean better by the feeling of pleasure then you take the cake no contest but if you literally better kisser, Fang wins,"  
>"Ok...at least you were honest,"<p>

I smiled.

"Don't worry; at the rate you're going, you're going to surpass her,"

She scoffed in the "you're not off the hook" manner.

"What's the worst experience you've ever had with me?"  
>"To be honest, there isn't a bad experience that I can think of, only ones that aren't as good as others,"<br>"What's the least then?"  
>"Had to be the time when we went to that theme park last month, when you dumped the snowcone all over me,"<br>"But it was an accident!"  
>"I know and it's alright...but Maker...that was cold,"<br>"I'm sorry..."  
>"You warmed me back up anyways,"<p>

I winked at her and she smiled still with a tinge of pink her cheeks. How could she still be so innocently nice even after all these years?

"Same question,"  
>"When you told me that Fang kisses better than me,"<br>"I'm sorry about that but you told me to be honest,"  
>"I know..."<p>

She pouted.

"Had enough?"  
>"One more round,"<p>

I thought for a moment.

"Would you ever have chosen someone else over me if you liked them?"

It was amazing that we said that in complete unison. Light took a breath.

"There's...no way I could choose another person over you,"  
>"I couldn't have said it better myself,"<p>

A moment of silence came before she opened her mouth.

"Do you think…we can make this work?"

I raised an eyebrow.

"Isn't that what we're doing now?"  
>"Yes…but now that we know all of the right and wrong things, do you think we can make it work despite the past?"<br>"Of course we can…there's nothing we can't take on together,"  
>"Yeah…you're right,"<p>

She shook her head as if she were snapping herself from her train of thought.

"So…are you glad we did this in the first place?"

I smiled and the mirrored gesture was followed by a passionate kiss.

"_Damn right I am…"_

This was surely the right decision and feeling her approval through her lips and her actions only made me believe it even more. This relationship was finally back on track…well, at least it seemed that way. At least I can call it a relationship now instead of a "mess"…


End file.
